Once Upon a Year...

Christmas 2004

One year ago today, I lost my hero! He fought the good fight and he, not only finished, but he won the race! For those of you that don't know, today is the one year anniversary of my stepfather's death and the last 12 months have been such a reminder of God's grace that helps us to get through. In Paul's letter to the Corinthian church, he writes,

"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power

is made perfect in weakness." Therefore

I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses,

so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

2 Corinthians 2:9

He has been sufficient to grow me in my weakness. I think that I have grown more in the past year than total in my four years as a believer. God really knows how to humble His people and make them cling to the cross of His Son. When Kelley died, I think I had fallen as far away from God as one could get, I had an "I don't care" attitude and in Kel's death, God made me realize that none of this life is about me! Hard lesson to learn? Of course!! I think about God's timing and I have to just glorify Him for knowing exactly what it would take for me to turn back and find my way back to His throne. The biggest lesson that I learned was figuring out how to be grateful for EACH and EVERY day! When Kel went to the hospital on July 4th, my selfish thoughts were "I'm over this" and little did I know that 15 days later we would be leaving the hospital without him. Yes, it has been a tough year and I miss the stink out of Kelley, but I wouldn't EVER want him to come back! I know that he is bowing at the foot of our Savior and lifting up sweet songs of worship each moment and that he will be there waiting for me one day. In all honesty, I am a bit jealous, but grateful all at the same time. I am so excited that he humbled himself before the mighty God about a year before he died. He was such an amazing example of a changed heart and he lived out his faith. He was a blessing to our family and he will ALWAYS be my hero! His spirit lives on in the midst of sadness and grief, and it is a spirit of a disciple who undoubtedly heard

"Well done, good and faithful servant. You have

been faithful over a little; I will set you over

much. Enter into the joy of your Master."
Matthew 25:23

Thank you God for teaching me lessons and growing me through the toughest hour of my life. Teach me to find my strength in You and to use this time of weakness to glorify You and You alone. You are the only one worthy of my praise and I pray that I will never neglect to lift my eyes to You in times of great need. What a friend I have in Jesus! God is soo good... :)