Unquenchable

My Lovely Lady Lumps...An Update

2010-04-13T08:36:00.000-07:00

And the peace of God, which surpasses

all understanding, will guard your hearts

and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7

Yesterday morning, at 6:45 AM cst, prior to leaving Auburn to head to Columbus for my doctor's appointment, Matt and I spent some time in prayer. It was our prayer that the Holy Spirit would manifest Himself so that at the day's end we would know He was there. We also prayed for the LORD to reveal Himself through us to others by giving us opportunities to trust Him and be found in Him throughout the day. He did those things. He was faithful to give peace and comfort and understanding.

The morning was nervous, but we were intentional about our thoughts. We made it a point to laugh a lot on the journey and keep our minds focus on the things we know were true. The LORD remains! And, after all was said and done, we received a good report! Turns out that the lump the doctor found is just one of several cysts in the tissue. The radiologist informed me that things like that were completely normal for women my age and that he saw no reason to pursue removing them. A GREAT REPORT!!

Now that the trial has past us, please continue to pray that Matt and I, individually and corporately would still be given opportunities to reflect the glory of King Jesus in our lives to those that have no hope. Any news that we got yesterday would have paled in comparison to the fact that JESUS IS BETTER!! We serve a merciful God. Praise the LORD for opportunities to trust His faithfulness. Thanks so much for your prayers. You are loved. God is always good...

My Lovely Lady Lumps...

2010-04-02T07:39:00.000-07:00

I don't really know how to write this blog. I didn't really know how to talk to God this morning about the content of this blog. I don't really know how to handle the news I got yesterday. It was hard, but God is better! So, all things aside, please be in prayer.

Many are the plans in the mind of a man,
but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.
Proverbs 19:21

It took me about 3 minutes after I walked out of the back of the doctor's office yesterday to process the news. My first thought, as selfish as it was, "Well that's definitely not how things are supposed to go." Then, I called my mom and cried. I drove a mile, fell into the arms of my favorite person, and we cried together. And then, we committed to a plan that we are going to trust God. And, as easy as that is to say, we will need your prayers on our behalf to stick to that plan. We are not anxious, but it would be quite the lie to say that things are not scary.

I went to the "big girl" doctor yesterday for an annual screening and to talk about some "marriage medicine". Well, the doctor found a lump in my right breast that she was a bit uncomfortable about and has referred me to the St. Francis Breast Cancer Center for an ultrasound in a little over a week. And the doctor says, that while it may not be malignant, a surgeon may still want to remove whatever the knot is. Cancer is scarier than surgery. Surgery is still very scary.

That's right, 6 weeks before I graduate college and 4 1/2 months before I get married, WHAM!!, a huge brick wall. Well, if God doesn't know how to shake a person up, then I don't know who does. Matt and I know and trust all the things we hold to. God is sovereign. He is in control of my health and my life. He loves us. He has quite the purpose for this "surprise". And while all of those things are comforting, I would be lying you and myself if I told you that I am not scared.

Please pray for me. Pray for us. Pray that we will respond appropriately to the things we will learn on Monday, the 12th. Please pray that we will shine the light of the Gospel to our nurses and doctors and anyone else that may be watching. Pray that the LORD will be glorified in all aspects of this ordeal. He is worthy. I know that I deserve death. The fact that He has granted me breath for 25+ years, that alone is worthy of my praise and gratitude. Thank you for your prayers, we will keep you posted. God will never not be good....

For I the Lord do not change; therefore you,
O children of Jacob, are not consumed.
Malachi 3:6

A Tree Saw, Taco Bell, and a Diamond Ring...the VIDEO!

2010-02-09T13:37:00.000-08:00

Hey friends and loved ones, the video(s) is finally up and ready to view. Follow the links below...

Proposal Part 1

Proposal Part 2

Enjoy!!

A Tree Saw, Taco Bell, and a Diamond Ring...

2010-02-08T07:50:00.000-08:00

Therefore a man shall leave his father and
his mother and hold fast to his wife,
and they shall become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24

On Saturday, February 6, 2010, just 8 short months after our second first date, Matt asked me to be his wife. I, obviously, said YES. And this is our story. I sure hope that you laugh more than you "ooo" and "aww" because the story is quite awkwardly funny. But it's our story. And I love it. Hope you enjoy! **Please keep in mind that I knew this day was coming, but for months, all Matt really wanted was for me to be surprised. He went to great lengths to make that happen.**

For more than one reason, Saturdays are "our day" without fail each week. Mainly because, well, we don't see each other any other day of the week because we live in different cities. So, we spend breakfast through dinner together every Saturday, like clockwork. Sometimes, that means just resting with one another, going for walks together, playing a little tennis, or, as was the case this particular week, going to estate sales and cutting a tree down. That leads us to the first part of our story...

Several months ago, the insurance company informed Matt's parents that there were several large branches overhanging their unit at the condo in Auburn and the problem would need to be addressed sooner rather than later to avoid losing coverage. Matt decided that this would be a great day to do that, but he had no idea the extent that we would have to go to remove these branches. At 8 that morning, he picked me up from my apartment (not having taken a shower because I knew we would be cutting down a tree) and we went to breakfast. Following breakfast we ran to borrow a ladder, and randomly went by a friend's estate sale, before returning to the condo to do some work. Well, the ladder turned out to be too small, so we headed to Lowe's to purchase a TREE SAW. After sawing and pulling and clipping large heavy branches for about 4 hours, we were finally done and he took me back home to get a shower and get dressed for dinner and a quick trip to Walmart.

So, all I knew at 4:15ish when he picked me up was dinner and Walmart. We had not eaten since breakfast, so I suggested a nice restaurant, but since I had been on a healthy habit diet for about 2 weeks (and living next door to Taco Bell doesn't aid me in any way), when he suggested we just grab some Taco Bell, I was thrilled. He did mention that he wanted to eat it somewhere other than the restaurant, and suggested we go to the parking deck on campus that overlooks the Hitchcock Field. Folks, I am oblivious, please keep that in mind. My focus at this point was one thing -- TACO BELL! -- for two reasons. First, I was starving. Second, it had been weeks since I had it and I really wanted some. Ha.

So we head towards the parking deck and rather than straight there, he pulled into the parking lot outside Samford Stadium. He made reference to wishing there was a baseball game, then suggested we attempted to get into the stadium. I, annoyed and hungry, suggested that we "don't and say we did" and just get to eatin! But, I thought to just appease him for a few minutes would make the process much quicker, then we could EAT! **I think it is important to mention here that Matt and I met one another for the first time at a baseball game in March 2005 and going to Auburn baseball games together has been "our thing" for as long as we have known one another, whether friends or dating.** So we get out of the car, walk around the ticket booth for a few minutes looking for an open gate, and I, content that no gates are open, suggest we leave and go eat. He, ran to the car and grabbed his winter gloves and then asked me to walk a little further to find an open gate. We walked to some other openings and then walked back to the ticket booth and he offered me his gloves because my hands were FREEZING! Well, it took about 5 seconds after I put the gloves on to realize that there was a stunning, gorgeous DIAMOND RING in the left ring finger of the glove.

My first response, "Shutup!" My second response, tears (of joy no doubt) and falling into his chest. Matthew proceeded to say some sweet things and then finally said to me, "Sarah Ashley, I love you, will you marry me?" With tears and excitement, I obviously said yes and then, to my horror, he informed me that we would NOT be eating the blessed manna from heaven that is Taco Bell sitting in the car. My response, "What? Why not?" His answer, "Because I don't think Nancy and Joe would want Taco Bell for dinner after having driven this far." That's right, my sister and her husband were hiding out and videotaping/photographing the whole thing and it was all a surprise to me!

It was a GREAT day! I am blessed and could not be happier. I remind myself daily that this is not a dream, but that God has ordained this process. We will see this stage of our lives come to fruition on August 21, 2010 at 2 PM in Auburn, AL and we would love nothing more than for each of you, our loved ones, to join us. Also, please stay tuned in the next few days as I will post a link to the video once it has been uploaded to YouTube. Continue to pray for us in the new stage and time of our lives. It will be hectic, but fun, hard but well worth it in the end. God is so good....

Let The Nations Sing It Louder...

2009-12-02T14:17:00.000-08:00

After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude
that no one could number, from every nation,
from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing
before the throne and before the Lamb
Revelation 7:9

Sitting in the office today, waiting for time to pass, I turned on some music. I am currently in love with the song Your Name, and I sing it out often! For those of you that have never had the pure joy to shout this worship cry to the LORD, here are the lyrics of the chorus. (Also, have a little listen at the link provided.)

Your Name
Your Name is a strong and mighty tower
Your Name is a shelter like no other
Your Name, let the nations sing it louder
Cause nothing has the power to save
But Your Name

As I sat at my desk trying so hard to sing it softly, as not to disrupt and scare my fellow employees, I was stuck with this thought, and I want to encourage each of you to pray with me for this matter this season...

This past Sunday, in Southern Baptist Convention world, we kicked off our season of Lottie Moon Christmas giving. Well, to those of you that don't know the importance of Lottie Moon, it is a special offering program that takes place each year at Christmas, all the money given to this campaign goes directly to the International Mission Board and helps support the staff, missionaries, projects, and supplies of that branch of the convention. So, for a more personal example, my gift and your gift of sacrificial giving goes directly to many individuals that I love and miss and pray for daily. Including, but not limited to, David & Mindy and little Luke, Tyler & Jennifer and sweet Hope and (soon) Sophia, Matthew & Christi and precious James and Abigail, just to name a few. So, what does this song, that offering, and those people have to do with one another? Well I am so glad you asked....

This season, as we celebrate the truth of Christmas, that is, the birth of the Son of God, who for the obedience of the Father and the heart of redemption for His people, gave of Himself everything. He made Himself nothing to redeem a people that mock Him. He stepped down from His throne, put aside His greatness and became the least for you and I, and poured out Himself by becoming the ultimate sacrifice for a lost world. As we remember that this year, I urge you dear friends, to give back to Him in a manner that is worthy of the call of the Gospel. Gifts are not bad. But this year, make a tangible, sacrificial gift this year to the men and women that have given their lives, and their childrens' lives, to the service of the LORD for the sake of the Gospel. Your gift to support this ministry will allow the nations to sing the name of JESUS louder! Prayerfully ask God to reveal to you the gift that He would have for you to give. Remember, it is His to start with, and He will not press upon your heart to give more than He in return can provide to you. Merry Christmas to each of you. Thank you David and Mindy. Thank you Tyler and Jennifer. Thank you Matthew and Christi. Thank you for making Lottie Moon personal to me. Thank you for being joyfully obedient to God's call of your lives. Thank you for loving Jesus enough to go, that the nations may know. You each are blessing to me, in ways none of you could ever imagine. You are missed this season, but He is better! Praise the LORD!! God is good....

so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,

in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:10-11

Thankful Traditions....

2009-11-18T12:02:00.000-08:00

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts,
to which indeed you were called in one body.
And be thankful.
Colossians 3:15

So, this year, my mother has decided to start a new family tradition, one in which she has asked each of her children (and their significant others) and her grandchildren to list the 5 things they are each most thankful for this year. She will be keeping record of these things and creating a family scrapbook to be available for generations to come. So, since you people take such interest in my life and have invested your time in reading this and praying for me, why not share each of them with you as well. **Mom said we could be as detailed or not as we so desire.**

This year, 2009 has been great. How does a girl as lucky as I only give thanks for 5 things?! It's a tough assignment, but I pray that the LORD is glorified in my response. Happy Thanksgiving to each you. Your prayers and continued support of me have lifted and carried me this year. Though my readers did not make my top 5, I pray that each of you know my gratitude for your devotion to me through the years. You are each a special blessing!

1) The LORD's provision of 2009. This year has been one of ups and downs, left and right turns, but the one constant is the LORD. I am so very grateful that He is unchanging. He is never caught off guard. In this year, with trials I could have never forseen, the LORD has remained faithful and confident. He is still providing my every need and He has not given up on me. Praise the LORD that He has a plan for me. With each passing day, life is sweeter with Him. For His sacrifice and kept promises, I am truly indebted.

2) My family. Each member of my family plays a vital role in my everyday life. I am thankful for my mother, because she never fails to communicate to me how very proud she is of me, regardless of how much we butt heads sometimes! For my siblings, I am thankful that you call and text to just check up on me, that you haven't forgotten my life in the midst of your own busy schedules, and that we have each become best friends over the years. I am thankful for my precious nieces, who convey their love to me through bright smiles and creative art pages. At 5 and 2, I don't yet think they grasp just how encouraging they are to me. And how could I forget the unending prayers and notes of support that I get from my aunts, uncles, and grandparents, without those I would be so lost. Thank you to my family, which I cherish, for loving me in each of your own ways. I am blessed.

3) My education. As my time in Auburn comes closer and closer to an end (hallelujah), I am reminded that I would never have been afforded this opportunity beyond the sacrificial gift of my parents. I am so thankful to my stepfather, Kelley, for offering me a chance to get my degree from Auburn. Because of his hard work and selfless sacrifices, I was given a shot at one of the nation's top SEC schools, and because the LORD is gracious, we will see that come to fruition in several months. Had my parents not given of themselves, I haven't the slightest idea where I would find myself right now. My time at Auburn has proven to be difficult, but sweet nonetheless. I have not only learned more about the world around me, but I have learned to love and depend on JESUS on such a deeper, sweeter level. For the gift of my education from my precious stepfather, I am truly grateful.

4) Matthew. Who would have imagined?! I am so very grateful for Matt. He is an answer to many prayers. I appreciate that he reminds me daily that I am valuable, to him, to others, and to the LORD. He encourages me to love JESUS on a new level with each passing day. Matt wants whats best for me always, and he tries so hard to ensure that I am happy always. Above anything else, he is a great leader and a great follower of our LORD. His passion for the nations and Kingdom work is contagious. His zeal for the spiritual growth of others is selfless. Some days I wonder what the LORD had in mind 4 years ago, but I know that His plan is perfect and I am glad He was in charge. For our time thus far, as friends and more, I am so appreciative. Thank you, Matthew, for loving JESUS more than me, and me more than yourself.

5) Rest, which hopefully lead to health. Hey, even the LORD rested! If it was important to Him, it must be worth my time as well. With all gratitude in my heart, I am glad for a week of rest. Many of you may not know, but I have been struggling with headaches for several weeks, and I have finally gone to the doctor. I think this week of rest and no responsibility with people that I enjoy being around is needed now more than ever. I appreciate my mother opening her home to Matt and I for a week of much needed rest.

As you can see, I have much to be thankful for. I am so very blessed. The LORD has been gracious to me. HAPPY THANKSGIVING to each of you. God is good...

Get Serious...

2009-10-21T11:16:00.000-07:00

Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.
Matthew 3:2

Maybe I should not let it bother me, but it does, so I blog. Today at work, I was addressed by my boss about a particular status that was posted on my FACEBOOK profile earlier this week. Here's the background info....

Monday morning, I came back to the office after conducting surveys for 3 hours. Every Monday after a home football game, it is the duty of the first person that has office hours to clean out the 6 ice chests (spray with clorox and wipe down with rag). It's a simple job. Very simple. So, much to my frustration, when I returned from doing surveys, the other office assistant had not (again) cleaned them out, she was, however, sitting at the desk watching the Sunday night episode of Desperate Housewives that she had missed the night before due to illness. Needless to say, I got a bit hacked off, cleaned out the ice chests myself, and did some other office tasks. Then, when my work was complete, I got on FB and posted a status that read

"dear office workers of the world,
catching up on the latest episode of desperate housewives DOSE NOT constitute actual office work (especially when there are lots of things you could be doing or helping your co-workers with). thanks.
all my love, SAH"

Well, apparently EVERYONE in the office caught wind of the status update, even those that don't have a FB account. (How did that happen you ask? Oh, well someone printed it out and gave copies to the bosses.) So today is Wednesday and I was approached by the office manager regarding the matter. Frustrating to say the LEAST!!

But frustrating for other reasons than just the obvious. It really bothers me that people take FB so literal and serious. It's a problem! I mean, there are far bigger issues in the world that need to be taken far more seriously than the status update of a disgruntled college office assistant. To name a few, MARRIAGE, PARENTHOOD, and last, but certainly not least, SALVATION!!!!!

If more people in the world would focus on the gospel of Jesus Christ and take that even half as serious as they take FB status updates, then we would see the completion of the promise of Matthew 24:14, "...and then the end will come," possibly in this lifetime. Facebook has become a horrible deterrent to the eternal work of the LORD. I speak for myself, no one else, when I say that I waste more time on pointless, unimportant, crap everyday and I spend far less time than I should be on things that hold eternal standings, like prayer and evangelism. Jesus knew what He was talking about when He proclaimed "the kingdom is at hand." And if we want to see an end to this world (please LORD) in our lifetimes, we have lots of work to do. And that salvation work, my brothers and sisters, FAR outweighs any of the gossip and applications you will find on Facebook. Let's get those priorities in check. God is good....

Ps...check out this beautiful rendition of Jesus Messiah by Chris Tomlin, sung by teenage MS siblings who call themselves Daves Highway. Guaranteed to bless your heart...enjoy.

Jesus Messiah by Daves Highway

Finally....

2009-09-29T06:21:00.000-07:00

My mouth will speak the praise of the LORD,
and let all flesh bless His holy name forever and ever.
Psalm 145:21

I spent my Sunday, my day of rest, studying ancient Africa and India for my history class. While I was studying, my laptop music was on shuffle. Shane and Shane sort of dominate my hard drive, so I was not surprised when lots of their songs played in those 6 hours of study. But, when Burn Us Up, from their Pages cd played, I just had to stop and sit and meditate on what true faith looks like. The song, a musical rendition of the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (Daniel 3), talks of the unwavering faith that these three men had in the LORD, even in the face of death. My favorite part of the story/song, when they stand up to King Nebuchadnezzar and tell him that they will not bow down to his golden image, they will gladly face a fiery furnace for the glory of the LORD Almighty. And they trusted that He would deliver them. BUT, they go on to tell the king that even if God did not deliver them, it would not matter.

You see, this is one of my favorite stories in the Bible because it is so realistic. The guys knew that God had the power to deliver them from the fire, but that He was not obligated to do so. If it would bring honor to Him, they would gladly burn for His namesake. How cool is that?! That, my friends, is faith at its finest!! And that example of faith is what got me through meeting after meeting this past week regarding my academic future. I have been in several meetings over the past few days regarding clearance for graduation in May, and with each additional meeting and more and more red tape, I had to continually remind myself that God is still God and He still sits on His throne, regardless of whether I get cleared or not. He is sovereign and has a perfect plan. And, it was with GREAT JOY that I met with my advisor yesterday afternoon and, finally, after years of struggle and hard work, I filled out my diploma application and received clearance to graduate from Auburn University on May 14, 2010!!! (I smiled so much yesterday that it hurt, but I just kept on!!)

Now comes time for reflection. I look back over the past few years at Auburn and, honestly, I don't know that I would change a thing. Yes, I have struggled in ways that most college students don't. Yes, it has been a long haul. Yes, I think I have worked longer and harder for this degree than it should take. BUT, JESUS is sweeter to my now than he ever would have been. I have grown, in more ways than I have adjectives to explain. He has shown me things these years that I would absolutely have missed if I had not worked so hard and struggled so much. He is good. Has has shown me that time and time again. He provides for my needs, and indulges my wants, and He has proven that over and over. Praise the LORD for the past few years. It is by His grace alone that I have made it this far. He upholds me, and because of that reason alone, I will finish strong! The LORD is gracious to me. Thank you Jesus! God is good!!

Leaning....

2009-09-15T19:59:00.000-07:00

Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love,
but a faithful man who can find?
Proverbs 20:6

The semester has begun!! And it seems I am busier than ever these days. Over the past few years, I have gotten so used to a full-time job, full-time school, a part-time job, serving the youth at church, making time for friends, AU football and whatever else is thrown my way. I can juggle all of that so well because I have done it for so long. I guess you could say that I've "mastered" the art of being busy. Well, this year, just for kicks and giggles and to spice things up, I have thrown a new, and refreshingly delightful, piece into the puzzle of my life. His name is Matt. He is worth my time, what little time he gets with both of our schedules being crazy and all. (ha) I like him. He likes (puts up with) me. I think we both like that. He keeps me sane. He helps me realize how little I love Jesus and makes me want to love Him more! (that's my favorite part!) Basically, he's great! I am blessed to have him in my life, though I took his friendship so for granted the past 4 years. God is gracious to change hearts.

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10

All that said, I AM BUSY! I stay tired most of the time. When I am not on the clock at work, at either job, I am either in class, at church, with Matt, with friends, or studying. Oh yeah, some days I get lucky enough to catch a shower and a few hours of sleep, but that is rare! (Praise the LORD for the recent rain - ha!) So I was listening to one of Ella's cds in the car the other day and came across a song that I love and have just so forgotten about for years! It made me think. Especially in these days that I am tired and running on empty. And in the days that I worry about a test, a bill, or getting anything other than work, work, school, church, boyfriend, and friends done (i.e. cleaning my apt), I have stopped over the last few days and sang this refreshing prayer of thanksgiving to my Rock, the one who has Everlasting Arms to uphold me on my weary days, and to catch me on the days that I forget how much I really do need Him and the support of His mighty and righteous right hand. Thank you Lord for your sustaining power on the long days and your grace on the days I have the energy to go all night! God has never not been good....

What a fellowship, what a joy divine
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
What a blessedness, what a peace is mine
Leaning on the everlasting arms.

Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.

What have I to dread? What have I to fear?
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
I have blessed peace, with my LORD so near
Leaning on the everlasting arms.

Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.

The Life That We Pursue....

2009-07-31T14:07:00.000-07:00

**DISCLAIMER**

This blog may come across as more soapbox-ish than normal. But I have really found myself quite fed up with this matter the past few days and weeks. It may not be directly intended for you, but it is indirectly intended for each and every member of the body of Christ, myself included. We are guilty as a whole. In my disgust toward others, I, too, have been convicted. (Sorry, it's long!)

*** *** ***
Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count
others more significant than yourselves. Let each
of you look not only to his own interests, but also to
the interests of others. Have this mind among
yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though
He was in the form of God, did not count equality with
God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing...

This week, I have really been pondering the words of the Casting Crowns song, What If His People Prayed. The song, as a whole, is very telling of the state we find the Church in these days. I like (meaning I dislike) it all. The song is great. I like that. The song is true. I despise that. There are a few lines highlighted that I have been really wresting with this past week.

(1)What if the armies of the LORD
Picked up and dusted off their swords
Vowed to set the captives free
And not let satan have one more

(2)What if the Church for heaven’s sake
Finally stepped up to the plate
Took a stand upon God’s promise
And stormed hell’s rusty gates

What if His people prayed
And those who bear His name
Would humbly seek His face
And turn from their own ways

(3)And what would happen if we pray
For those raised up to lead the way
Then maybe kids in school could pray
And unborn children see light of day

(4)What if the life that we pursue
Came from a hunger for the Truth
What if the family turned to JESUS
Stopped asking Oprah what to do

What if His people prayed
And those who bear His name
Would humbly seek His face
And turn from their own ways
He said that He would hear
His promise has been made
He’ll answer loud and clear
If only we would pray

Never before have my eyes been so opened to the reality that the greatest enemy of the Church is just that, the Church. Who the heck needs the schemes of the devil and the influence of the world; it has been brought to my attention that we, as the body of Christ, are doing a pretty sufficient job of tearing one another down. Why is that?! Honestly, think about that one highlighted line above, “what if the life that we pursue came from a hunger for the truth.” We are exerting too much energy on things that have zero significance to the work of the Kingdom.

I saw, indirectly, the effect of this very thing within a body as a young believer. My senior year of high, just one year after surrendering my life the LORD, my former pastor and a dear man of God, was viciously betrayed by members within his own congregation and by men he so trusted as deacons of our church. Men and women who claimed Christ attacked the character and commitment of a man who had tirelessly preached the truth of God’s Word for several years. He was now being shoved out of the very pulpit to which he was called to serve years earlier. That was 6+ years ago. The LORD has been faithful to His promise to never leave or forsake. It was unfortunate for me to experience that at all, much less at a very young spiritual age.

This past week, I have learned of more crap (sorry mom), to a lesser extreme, between members of the body. I’ll just say this, I feel that the LORD has given me a clear vision that one of, not my only, but one of my spiritual gifts is that of encouragement. (And might I just add, I love it!!) Not everyone is called to be that of an encourager, just as not all believers are called to be that of preachers and teachers. We have all been gifted in ways that allow us to work together. But if the goal of the Father was to give us each gifts that enable us to work together, what is the hold up?! I do not believe that there is a such thing as “too much encouragement.” I also don’t believe that encouragement is bad. That’s not what I am being told. And it frustrates me!

(**The following example is several years past and there is more to it than I will reference here in this blog. The situation has been gloriously and completely reconciled. The person to whom I refer is still an important person in my life. No hard feelings.**)

There once was a time in my life when I was told by a friend that it was “not my job” to encourage him. Needless to say, that was quite heartbreaking for me. As a member of the body of Christ, it is, in fact, my job to encourage, pray for, and support those around me, with specificity on family, close friends, and those found in a leadership role. This person, in fact, met 2 of the specific requirements. I did not, and still don’t, feel that I encouraged, prayed for, or supported him in any different way than others in my life. Who was he to tell me that it was not my job to fulfill my requirements as a member of the body?! John MacArthur says, “Spiritual gifts are divine enablements for ministry that the Holy Spirit gives in some measure to all believers and that are to be completely under His control and used for the building of the church to Christ’s glory.” I mean, as a teacher, it was his job to teach. So, if the LORD has so called me to be a laborer for others in the task of encouraging, praying, loving, and supporting, WHO ARE YOU to disable those actions?!

We, and I admit that I am just as guilty as the next, need to get it together! Maybe, if we devoted more time to telling others about JESUS or encouraging the laborers of the harvest, and less time bickering and attacking one another, we might see an end come. How will all nations hear and all people see if we don’t put some, if not all, our efforts towards that?! I don’t know about you, but I want to JESUS, sooner would be better than later, and for that to happen, we need the gospel to go forth!! (Matt 24:14) I would implore you to be mindful of those around you. While you may do things differently than they do, it is not your job to dictate the way they execute their spiritual callings. It is your job to come alongside of them and implement your own gifts all while serving and loving one another for ONE PURPOSE; JESUS CHRIST IS WORTHY! So, what if, the life that we, as individuals and as one corporate body, pursue came from a hunger for the TRUTH? Just imagine the step toward eternity that we could take. Pursue Christ or get out of the way of others trying to do that very thing. Eternity hangs in the balance. There is no time to waste. God is good….

...taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.
And being found in human form, He humbled Himself by
becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Therefore God has highly exalted Him and bestowed on Him the
name that is above every name, so that at the name of JESUS
every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under
the earth, and every tongue confess that JESUS CHRIST
IS LORD, to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:3-11

He's Faithful...

2009-07-24T06:56:00.001-07:00

Hey guys, just to update you all very quickly. God has proven Himself, yet again. He has provided for me a JOB!! After 2 1/2 long months, I was excited to start my job with the Tiger Transit office on Auburn's campus. I will be working as a student assistant, doing office work and other various jobs. Thanks to each of you who prayed diligently for this job and for God's provision of teaching in my time of unemployment. There is nothing like learning how to yearn more and more after JESUS when that is basically the only thing you have left. Time spent with Him is much sweeter now than it has been in previous months and years. He has been faithful to provide spiritual rest and help me meet my physical and financial needs during these months. Praise to HIM!! God is good...

You Can Be My Wingman Anytime....

2009-07-20T12:57:00.000-07:00

*** PREFACE***

I wrote this last Monday, July 13. I have failed to publish it for one week based on pure procrastination. It is unlike my typical post but I would still encourage you to read it and allow the LORD to remind you of the friends He has so blessed you with in your life and may it persuade you to also express your gratitude to Him and to your sweet friends.

*** *** ***

The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear Him
and He makes known to them His covenant.
Psalm 25:14

Tonight, as I sat under the teaching of my dear friend at youth girls’ Bible study, I couldn’t help but think back to the day that I met her and give thanks to the LORD for the way He has used her in my life over the years. I am blessed, and far too often I forget to say “THANK YOU” to those people in my life that encourage me to press on and follow hard after JESUS. Allow me this opportunity to do just that for you, my dear friend, Amelia.

I still remember the day I met her. Spring of 2004, I was a freshman at Auburn and she was a homeschooled junior in high school. Given the opportunity to spend one weekend in her home for a college retreat, hosted by her family. I don’t know what it was about her, maybe I saw lots of myself in her, but by the end of 2 ½ days, I knew she would be a big part of my college experience. I like to tell people that Amelia was God’s call on my life to work with teenage girls, and I stand by that. Still a young believer, I had not yet found my outlet for service within the local body, but after spending a weekend getting to know her, laughing with her, and discovering a heart for JESUS behind her sometimes “not so nice” spirit, I knew the LORD was using Amelia to show me that He would have me to serve with youth girls, with an extra special heart for high-schoolers. We have had some of the best times of my life together. Between adventures that almost got us killed and just sitting around in my apartment having serious, spiritually sound conversations, she so encourages my heart. It’s interesting to look back and see how the LORD used a college retreat weekend in my life for His glory and, without question, my good. My love and passion for youth girls only continues to deepen with each passing semester that the LORD calls me to serve.

Imagine the pride within my heart tonight as I watched Amelia passionately teach the Word of God to youth girls. Going through the book of Ruth this summer, Amelia has invested hours of preparation and time in prayer to be sure that she is knowledgeable and well-versed on her subject matter. But all of her study and wisdom aside, she brings such an intense enthusiasm to the table when she opens her copy of God’s Word and proceeds to expound His truth to teenage girls. The students of Lakeview Baptist Church and the Auburn community are blessed beyond imagination to have this amazing leader in its midst. Gratitude does not do justice to what we owe. Thank you, Amelia, for loving KING JESUS with such zeal and contagious excitement. Thank you for fervently and joyfully serving the LORD for one reason, because you know that HE IS WORTHY! You, my sweet friend, are a blessing and joy to my life. I grow more and more proud of you with each passing day. I am thankful that the LORD has given me the chance to watch you grow in your faith and yearning for Him. Thank you for your friendship. God is so good…

Pretty Much Addicted (again)...

2009-06-07T18:55:00.000-07:00

The other day, I was randomly inspired to turn on some Bethany Dillon! A few summers ago I found myself quite addicted to her music, it's pretty amazing and solid. Well, I am at that point again. I basically can't wait to wake up in the morning and hit play on the laptop while I am in my apartment. When I am in the car, the cd(s) plays. When I am in a public place and have access to my computer, the ear buds find their proper position. I am hooked...again. God is good....

Exodus - by Bethany Dillon

Come, come fallen ones
Dance in the healing stream
He has faithfully kept you
Brought you out of captivity

Rejoice, rejoice with all your hearts
Sing Him a new song
That’s heard high on the windswept mountains
It will resound

Lead, Lord, with unfailing love
Those that You have ransomed
And we will sing out as we go on
Our God is faithful
Our God is faithful

Reflect, reflect on all your days
You weren’t so free then
Once you were all called slaves
But now, blessed children

Move, move your feet
Dance before the Lord
On to the Promised Land
On to your reward, sing

Lead, Lord, with unfailing love
Those that You have ransomed
And we will sing out as we go on
Our God is faithful
Our God is faithful

Our enemies are at the bottom of the sea, our enemies
Our enemies are at the bottom of the sea, our enemies

Lead, Lord, with unfailing love
Those that You have ransomed
And we will sing out as we go on
Our God is faithful
Lead, Lord, with unfailing love
Those that You have ransomed
And we will sing out as we go on
Our God is faithful
Our God is faithful
Our God is faithful
Our God is faithful

Convicting Resolutions...

2009-06-05T09:18:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, when I woke up, I just knew it would be one of "those days." Girls, specifically those about my age or older, you know what I am talking about. Just one of those days when getting out of bed really only makes things worse. Why?! Well, for some reason, I ran across a verse days prior in Proverbs 18, and when I woke up yesterday, that verse was screaming loud in my ear and it just put me in a bad mood! Ha. Verse 22 states, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord." Now, I know you ask, "Why, Sarah, did this verse make you mad?" Well, daggum, some days I just wake up and think to myself "I WANT TO BE FOUND!" But, rather than just go back to bed, I continued with my day. And praise the LORD!!

Later that afternoon, I started a new book that I actually got for my birthday, but have not yet had time to read, The Unwavering Resolve of Jonathan Edwards by Dr Steven Lawson. Now, Jonathan Edwards has always been one of my favorite men of the faith. And I have done a few studies on him, but this book, I must say, is exceptional!! But, the LORD used my time in this book yesterday to put quite the conviction on my heart regarding the aforementioned complaint! While reading some history on the life of Edwards, when telling of his death, just months following the death of his son-in-law, his wife, Sarah, wrote a letter to their daughter, who had now lost her father and husband. Sarah's words are compelling and challenging. For one, what does a mother say to comfort her daughter in the the loss of the 2 most important men in her life, all the while Sarah is grieving the loss of her husband. These are her words...

"My very dear child, What shall I say? A holy and good God has covered us with a dark cloud. O that we may kiss the rod, and lay out hands upon our mouths! The Lord has done it. He has made me to adore His goodness, that we had him so long. But my God lives; and He has my heart. O what a legacy my husband, and your father, has left us! We are all given to God; and there I am, and love to be."

Umm, HELLO!! Did you catch that. In the midst of great grief, Sarah Edwards proclaims that her heart belongs to the LORD!! Wow! What a thought. There are days that I wonder what the prolonging may be. Then, there are moments like these, when I sit on my couch and read such truth, that I remind myself how stupid I sound! Do I want to be found? Well, sure. But too often I forget that I have already been sought out! The LORD has my heart, and should He see fit to share it with someone else, well in His timing it will be perfect. I mean, I didn't even have an opportunity to discover Edwards' resolutions before the LORD used his dear wife to convict my heart. Pray for contentment. God is, in fact, great.....

Peace of Mind...

2009-06-01T11:01:00.000-07:00

And the peace of God, which surpasses
all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:7

Hello all. (I am not thoroughly convinced yet that there are many, or any for that matter, of you, other than my mom who is and will always be my biggest fan, that actually still read this, but I will proceed just in case.) It’s Monday, June 1, and as I type this I am still jobless and relentlessly looking. There are tons of resumes and applications with my name on them within a 5 mile radius of my apartment and yet, I sit and wait for the phone to ring. And it frustrates me. Please continue to pray that the LORD will provide a job for me in the very near future. While I trust Him, I don’t think my bills or the companies that expect those bills will accept that as payment. I have just never found it to work that way.

So, I will, in about one hour, make one of the biggest decisions of my academic career and I have quite the peace about it. About 3 posts ago, I expressed to each of you that I was on the threshold of officially applying to the AU Social Work program. That official application process consisted of several letters of recommendation, a 4-page personal statement, and a formal interview. I also listed several ways that each of you could be praying for me specifically within the process of application. Well, the Monday after returning to Auburn from my short vacation home, I turned in all my paperwork and the following Tuesday, I completed my formal interview with my departmental advisor, Angie. For the most part, the interview went quite well. I was challenged on several of the questions, one in particular (ask me about it if you want to know), but I stayed true to myself and the feel like I honored the LORD in my answers and attitude. At one point, I was even given an interview “gold star” because I answered a very hard question with complete honesty, which Angie went on to tell me was quite contrary to how most students would answer. She was impressed that I had the audacity to be honest when I knew it was the exact opposite of what she wanted to hear. Praise the LORD that He gives grace for the moment to reveal Himself through my character. All I want to do is honor Him. And I feel that I made that quite clear in my interview.

With all that said, today, I feel the LORD leading me to now officially withdraw my program application and finish my degree in Sociology. I know what you are all thinking. And the answer is no, to all! No, it will not extend my time at Auburn. I can complete my degree in 6 classes, and will still graduate in May because this degree does not require an internship for graduation. And no, I don’t feel like I am making a big mistake. I feel that the LORD has prepared my heart to make this decision and that it is not a rash choice. Late Wednesday night, I just couldn’t rest my heart on the matter. I did a little research and a lot of praying, over the next 4 days, and I honestly feel this is the LORD. I have said in weeks past that I don’t really know what the LORD is up to, but I feel like He has started preparing me for something big, and I truly believe this may be part of that. I don’t know that I have ever felt this “unanxious” regarding such a huge decision in my life. He has really provided quite the peace about it and I am ready to trust His leading. And last, but not least, no, I do not know what I will do with a sociology degree. I do know that I can do essentially the same thing with a degree in sociology that I could have done with a degree in social work, I just won’t have a BSW behind my name. This opens opportunities in social services, public relations, business administration, etc. (Plus we all know that I really hope I don’t have to use my degree a whole lot in my life, that is just not the desire of my heart!) Either way, pray for continued peace. Pray that, above all, my eyes and heart will stay fixed on Him.

There are other things in my life. To which I will not discuss on this post, that you can each be praying about. I may post on that later, but don’t count on it at this point!! (Sorry, some things just need to remain a mystery!) But you can be praying for clarity in those aspects. Pray that the LORD would guide my heart and mind in the way He would have it go and that I would accept that as good and follow His leading faithfully. Thank you to each of you for your commitment to me. I am blessed. God is good…

For God is not a God of confusion
but of peace...
1 Corinthians 14:33

Just Been Eating At Me....

2009-05-25T21:59:00.000-07:00

So, as I watched television tonight, I found myself more and more frustrated with what I saw and heard. I, along with millions in America, tuned in to TLC's "Jon & Kate Plus 8" season opener and it was quite the "nail biter." It has been broadcast and advertised for weeks that this show would address the growing marital tension between the parents, who are both in the midst of tabloid gossip and paparazzi swarms for rumors of infidelity and scandal. I will admit, I watched the show because I wanted to know what would happen. I wanted to hear their stories. And as we all know, everyone has their own side of every story. And to be completely honest, I was sickened by the things I heard and saw.

It is no secret to most people that know me, I tend to give most people the benefit of the doubt most of time. Unless I know something especially destructive about someone, I will give them their fair opportunity to remain "innocent until proven guilty." Call it a flaw if you will, that's just how I am. So, I was willing to hear them out. Individually and corporately. And my conclusion is THEY ARE BOTH GUILTY!!

I have never had a negative thought toward the show in general. That is their way, as parents, to provide for their children a life that they never had themselves. They have gained tons of exposure as producers, writers, and speakers through the process, and that is fine. I have, however, always thought that there was a lack of mutual respect between the parents and that one in particular, requires perfection from 9 other people that will NEVER be perfect. I have noticed a lack of support in past years and quite the persistent use of "I," "I," "I" from the two lead characters. I feel, that may be what has landed them in the position they currently find themselves. And this is what I think..........

Be watchful, stand firm in the faith,
act like men, be strong.
1 Corinthians 16:13

STAND UP FOR YOUR MARRIAGE!! I sat on the edge of my seat tonight, wanting SO BADLY to hear one of these two adults, who claim Christ on their show and in conferences that they speak at, to express to the world that divorce is not and never will be an option for their family. Honestly, I know I am not married and have never found myself any of their positions, but even now, as a single college student, I am taking a stand for my own marriage in the future. Divorce, regardless of the situation I find myself and my spouse in, will NEVER be an option. It is off the table. It was never on the table. And it sickens me that so many people, especially those that publicly claim Christ as the Head of their marriage and their own personal lives, even entertain the idea of divorce. And while it seems commendable that both of the parents have vowed that they are "in it" for their children, children are NOT the most important aspect of a marriage. Yes, they play a big role and it is important to keep them a priority, but marriage is FAR bigger! Deciding to just "do what you gotta do" to make sure the kids are ok is not acceptable to me. The LORD commands us to "train a child in the way he should go." Imagine the lessons your sons are learning about becoming leaders and husbands who love their wives the way Christ loved the church. Imagine the lessons your daughters are observing about becoming a submissive wife of noble character. What example are we setting to the world?! We are to be in the world, not of it!!

I know this sounds like a soapbox, but it is far more than that! This is my challenge to each of you, married or not. COMMIT YOUR WAY (and marriage) TO THE LORD!! There will be trials, we can be certain of that, but it is not ok as a child of the LORD to just lay down and die. It is not ok to just accept the way of the world and give in to that. Make a commitment now, whether you are already married, happily or unhappily, or thinking about marriage, or single and hoping one day for that reality, commit to commit, 100%. Trust the LORD that He is in control. That you will not allow the things of this world to influence your decisions, rather, you will through prayer and thought, allow the LORD to lead you and your spouse in your marriage and your corporate pursuit of Him. And in that, you will learn how to lead your family in an eager pursuit of Christ, as a unit.

Ok, I am done now. Sorry if you think I was mean, it's just weighing heavy on my heart. Get it together Christians!! God is good.... :)

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord,
urge you to walk in a manner worthy
of the calling to which you have been called,
with all humility and gentleness,
with patience, bearing with one another in love,
eager to maintain the unity of
the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Ephesians 4:1-3

As Far As I've Gotten.....

2009-05-11T22:24:00.001-07:00

So, for those of you that do not know, I have left my job at All American. Last week was just a horrible week, for numerous reasons, and Monday morning, following a lengthy discussion, my time there had come to an end. My first response was fear and tears. Not gonna lie, I am scared to death. How does one pay bills without a job? My second response, go home!! My vacation was already scheduled to begin on Thursday, so I decided this morning that I would just extend that and spend some extra time with my family. They mean so much to me and I have MISSED them this semester. Praise the Lord that He provides a safe haven for me to be surrounded by love and support. My third, and lasting, response, "I don't know what I am going to do. Trust the Lord is about as far as I have gotten." And that is what I am prepared to do. He is not a provider, He is THE provider. All I have is His. He gives and takes away at His discretion. I have learned so much in my time at this job, but I honestly feel the Lord is preparing me for something more, something way bigger than monograms!! And I am excited to see that play out. He is good and what He does is good. I have been consistently reminding myself today, "my good, His glory."

As I drove home southbound on 65 today, through tear soaked eyes, I had the Gettys playing. A while back, the Lord lead me to their song Jesus Draw Me Ever Nearer. I fell in love with it and have had opportunity to pass that along to others in midst of struggles. I am reminded of His faithfulness when I hear the song. Praise the Lord that He is now able to use the song in my life in this time. What an encouragement. The words are amazing but they really don't do it justice without the music. I would encourage you to find the song online (their myspace page for example) and listen to it. Pray for me in this time of job search. I want to honor the Lord. Also please continue to pray for the requests in my last post! Thanks so much. God is GOOD.....

Jesus draw me, ever nearer
As I labor through this storm.
You have called me to this passing,
And I'll follow though I'm worn.

May this journey, bring a blessing.
May I rise on wings of faith.
And at the end of my heart's testing,
With Your likeness let me wake.

Jesus guide me through the tempest
Keep my spirit staid and sure.
When the midnight meets the morning,
Let me love You even more.

May this journey, bring a blessing.
May I rise on wings of faith.
And at the end of my heart's testing,
With Your likeness let me wake.

Let the treasures of the trial,
Form within me as I go.
And at the end of this long passing,
Let me leave them at Your throne.

May this journey, bring a blessing.
May I rise on wings of faith.
And at the end of my heart's testing,
With Your likeness let me wake.

May This Journey Bring A Blessing....

2009-04-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

**Ladies and gentlemen (if there are actually any people that read this thing), I would like to apologize for my inconsistencies in the blogging arena the past 18 months. Thanks for your understanding. Life gets crazy far too quickly! So, on with it.**

Yesterday, as I sat in my policy class, which for those of you that are not on my "call regularly to vent" list, you should ask me later about that class, this overwhelming feeling of conclusion hit me. As I sat in my desk, completing volunteer applications for my summer class, it occurred to me that I have about 12 months left in Auburn and those 12 months cannot go by quickly enough. Hear my heart on this.

I LOVE Auburn. And had you asked me 6 years ago if I would ever in my life utter those words, well most you can answer that without hesitation. But this place, this foreign land, has grown on me. I stood my ground for about 3 rebellious years. But I caved. And when I did, I found my heart smitten for this place. I LOVE IT! Period. I love my church, I love the people, I opportunities this town provides, and I love the experience. And I should hope, and tend to honestly believe, that Auburn, in turn, loves me. It has been said that if you love something you have to be able to let it go. I sure hope Auburn lets me go. Because, while I love Auburn, its people, its beauty, its serenity, you name it, I am SO READY to be gone from this place.

As I sat in class, I found myself recounting all the events that have brought me to this conclusion. In 6 years, I have been challenged in every aspect, spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially, professionally, and academically. Without hesitation, I can say that this semester has been the most challenging academically thus far. Now, my classes are not hard, per se, but I have been reminded on a daily basis, that this world is not my home. The further I dive into my major and get closer to graduation, the deeper I find myself engulfed with and hardened toward the sins of those around me. Don't get me wrong, the Lord has used Auburn in mighty ways to draw me unto Himself and teach me how to keep my focus on the cross of Christ in all situations, but this semester has been a challenge in the "love those that persecute you" aspect. I have been beaten and bruised for the truth of God's Word on a consistent basis within my major. And while I praise the Lord for giving me the courage to fight the battles day in and day out, one can only imgine how exhausted I have become. Within this semester alone, 15 weeks, I have written 6 papers, totalling over 100 pages of body text, one of those being a 67-page research proposal . To some of you, that may not sound like much. But that was just the paper assignments for 3 of my 4 classes. That doesn't include the mid-terms or regular tests or any of the homework or article analysis that I have also turned in. All while working 2 jobs, 40 hours a week and extracuricular acivities. I don't want your pity. I want you to understand my exhaustion. I need your help.

I need your prayers. Plain and simple. You ask, "how, Sarah, can we be praying specifically?" Well, I can answer that!!! (funny how that works) Other than the first 2 requests, these are in no particular prioritzed order. ha.

1- Within in the next few weeks, I will be officially applying to the Auburn University Social Work Program. The process is strenuous, requiring a personal statement (essay), several letters of recommendation, and a formal interview. Should I not be accepted into the program, I cannot complete this degree that I have so dilligently worked for. Please DO NOT pray specifically for my acceptance. Rather, I want to honor the Lord. Most, if not all, of the faculty members in SOWO have taught me in one or more classes. I was challenged at the beginning of my career within this major (known for all of its paper-writing) to share the gospel in each paper I write. I have, only by the Lord's grace, met that challenge head on for 3 years. Please pray that within my personal statement and interview that I will continue to honor the Lord. I have a very liberal and lost faculty. Pray that I will stand courageous to proclaim Christ in this application process, and that the Lord's will for my life will be made clear and complete, social work degree or not.
Psalm 37:5 -- Commit your way to the Lord. Trust in Him and He will act.

2- Pray for the unhardening of my heart. I confess that I have grown apathetic toward the sins of others. Through no fault but my own, my heart has grown hard toward sinners within my field of study. For instance, but not limited to, homosexuals. I am constantly reminding myself that Christ shed His precious blood for them as well and my sin is no better than their sin. I have lost interest in sharing the Truth, and in turn, have found my heart apathetic to their sin and the reality of their eternity. I know the Lord has a plan for me in this. Pray that I will take on the character of Christ in Paul, desiring to willingly offer my salvation of the behalf of the lost around me within my major.
Romans 9:3 -- For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh.

3- Pray that the Lord would fill me with energy to complete the work He started. Through many circumstances in my life, the Lord has cultivated within me a heart for service toward other people. He is good. What He does is good. He has called me to this place. He will complete it masterfully. But without Him, all of this is in vain. I am empty. Pray that He will fill me to overflowing and focus my heart on completing the task.
2 Corinthians 4:8-10 --We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.

4- Pray that the Lord would fill me with contentment for the next 12 months. In my 6 years in Auburn, I have never been so homesick. I wish to be with my family more than I can be. I wish to be away from this city. I do not want to be home in Mobile, but I want to get away from Auburn. Pray that the Lord would break my heart for the work that He still has for me here. That His Word will be my home. And that in Him, I will be content to dwell, regardless of where I rest my head. I am in alien, in all senses of the term.
James 1:4 -- And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

There are more ways you can be praying, but these are the most important. The Lord has been good to me. I have complete confidence that the Lord will continue to be good to me. It has not been easy. He never promised that. May I fix my eyes on Him as He perfects me. Thank you friends and loved ones. First, for reading this. I am more than 100% positive there are more interesting topics in the world, thanks for choosing me. Second, thanks for your eternal investment in me. Your prayers have lifted me and sustained me thus far, thank you all for your faithful intercession. And lastly, thanks to each of you for loving me, but better than that, reminding me of that love daily. I am so blessed. God is so good.... :)

In the Thicket...

2007-10-18T07:16:00.000-07:00

And Abraham lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold,

behind him was a ram, caught in a thicket by his horns.

Genesis 22:13

Have you ever had something that you thought was so great, something that only the Lord would bring into your life, and then all the sudden He asks for you to sacrifice that very thing? Yeah, well I'm there! And this is what I have to say about it. God is GOOD! He is faithful. HE IS ENOUGH FOR ME!

That said, I know it has been a while since I posted. I had every intention about 2 months ago to post and report on the lessons that I learned from the Word this summer, but things are just hectic...get over it! So, now you get a double whammy. What I learned this summer combined with how the Lord is teaching me to apply that knowledge presently.

For starters, I am good! School is going well, just trying to keep my head above water and still on track to graduate next May (2009). I am determined to get that diploma if it kills me! haha! Secondly, this summer. The overwhelming lesson that I learned this summer is that regardless of the things that will, or will not, happen in my life, whether all of my "dreams" come true or not, whether any of the things that I think I want or need for my life happen, the LORD is enough for me. I have reached such a stage of contentment with WHO He is. Alot of times, I felt I was looking past WHO He is and trying to find WHAT He is doing, but I have learned that I don't need a what, HE is enough. I find rest in Him alone. Period.

That said, it has been an eventful semester thus far. The Lord has really been challenging me, today more than ever, to live that lesson out. More than anything else, I want my actions to reflect my heart and words. I want to live a life that is refletive of His hand on me. Today, really last night, is the test of all these things. What will my next action be. Its time for the next thing. No dwelling, no sobbing, no looking back, only looking at Him, waiting for Him. And trust me, He is well worth the wait!

I am currently in a study of the Bible that allows me to read it chronologically as it was written. I am LOVING this study. This past week, I was able to study one of my favorite Bible stories, and for it to be one of my favs, I learned so many new concepts from it. I understand it on such a different level now. Even more so today, seeing that I feel the Lord calling me to practice what I have learned. Reading from Genesis 22, Abraham is asked to sacrfice his only son, Isaac, the promised child. The child that he and Sarah have waited YEARS for, now God wants him to kill him!? WHAT THE CRAP?! So, this is what I learned. First, it's important to see that Abraham obeyed the Lord immediately. He didn't waste time trying to rationalize, He just trusted God enough to obey. Secondly, I thought about what could have possibly been going on in Abraham's mind as he was binding his son to the wood and as he raised his hand to kill Isaac, the whole time Isaac is just asking, "Hey dad, where is the sacrifice?" Whoa!! I can't even imagine! But Abraham was focused on one thing, obedience. Thirdly, God provided in the thicket! And that got me thinking, what is it in my life that the Lord is calling for me to sacrifice for Him, only to prove Himself faithful to provide in the thicket?! **It was not a surprise to God that Abraham obeyed, it was more of a test for Abraham, God already knew what his response would be!**

Sacrifice is not easy, nor does the Lord promise that you will ever get that particular thing back, but He does promise to never leave or forsake us. He promises that He will be faithful when we are faithless. He promises us that if we delight in Him, in Him alone, He will give the desires of our heart. So, what is my sacrifice? Well, at this point in my life, it is a relationship with a very special person. As much as it sucks to be so invested and so sure that what you are doing is right, and that things are going great, it is so much cooler to trust God. We are choosing to obey His leading and trust Him to be enough for us, separately. We were content with and excited about where He was leading us, but we are even more content to be obedient and sensitive to His leadership now. Someone said to me, "things were going so great!" Well, just because things aren't going how you want, doesn't mean things aren't going great! We are ok. He is enough! Before, during, and after, He is enough. We serve a big God, a God who single-handedly placed every star in the sky. If He is that big, He can most definitely handle this. He is leading, we are following. That is all. Please be in prayer for widom and discernment. God is so good....... :)

Broken...

2007-06-26T17:34:00.000-07:00

My heart is heavy today. I feel like I have come leaps and bounds in my friendship with someone, only to be abandoned. I mean, is it me?! Have I done something wrong!? Is it wrong to express interest in the life of a friend and expect, at least the common decency of a response?! Is all of my investment in vain?! Seriously...at this point I feel like I am just wandering around, lost in the moment. I'm not really sure what God is trying to teach me, but I am content to find rest in His Word and trust that He knows what is best right now for Sarah. I am brokenhearted and weak. I have nothing to offer. But He is still on His throne and sovreign. And He still has a plan for me and my best interest in mind. And He is still good.... :)

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope
without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.
Hebrews 10:23

A Noticeable Change...

2007-05-22T10:44:00.000-07:00

Last night, we started our summer Bible Study for college girls and I couldn't be more excited as we look into the book of Nehemiah this summer. It is so nice to study the Word of God with like-minded girls and sit under the teaching of Jenn Stinn. I cannot wait to see how God uses these next few months of study in my life to grow me in the knowledge of Himself. I have already learned so much and last night was the first night!

That said, we talked alot last night about what it means to be broken. To be so burdened for sin that you can do nothing but cry out to God on High! One thing that Jenn has really made me aware of the past few years, is that from before the beginning of time, God has only had one thing on His mind and planned for His people. That one thing, redemption. You can find God's plan of redemption in EVERY book, chapter, and verse of Scripture. And that is incredible to me. So, having learned that, that is always one of the first things that I look for each day that I study the Word of God. I constantly find myself asking, "How does this particular thing tie in to the redemption of God's people from sin?"

As we opened our Bibles to Nehemiah last night, the first thing that got my attention was perfectly painted picture of brokenness. We learn in the first few verses that Nehemiah is Jewish, but other than that, he has no ties to the Jerusalem or Judah, the nation of Israel. But, when he found out about the sin of the people of Jerusalem and the wall being broken, verse 4 lists five verbs. Nehemiah immediately did five things.

As soon as I heard these words I sat down

and wept and mourned for days, and I continued

fasting and praying before the God of heaven.

Ok? So what's the big deal? Well, the big deal is that none of the sin that Nehemiah was broken over was his, nor did it have anything to do with him. He mourned for the sin of his people. Then, we see that Nehemiah, as cupbearer to the king, risked his life when he went before the king with a broken and saddened spirit. He submitted himself to the laws of the king and he could easily have been put to death, but the king found favor with him. Now, how does all this relate to God's plan of redemption? Stay with me!

What did Jesus Christ do in the garden the night he was betrayed? He wept for the sin of the people of the world. He was the cupbearer to the King of Kings, and He found favor with the Most High God. He was broken for my sin. He died for a sin that was not His and had nothing to do with Him. He submitted Himself to the will of the Father. WOW! What an incredible picture of salvation.

Praise the Lord that we serve a God who sympathizes with us and finds Himself broken on our behalf. It is my prayer that I will learn how to mourn over the sins of others, sins that have nothing to do with me. That I will proclaim God's plan of redemption to those around me that are not burdened by their own sin yet. I pray that the nations will see their need for a Savior and cry out to the King of all Kings! Oh to be broken in an unbroken world, what a noticeable change that will be! Pray for me! God is so good... :)

My God Is So Big...

2007-05-02T19:05:00.000-07:00

One of Ella's favorite songs for me to sing with her is My God is So Big. The words of the song go like this (feel free to sing along).....

My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty
There's nothing my God cannot do!
My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty
There's nothing my God cannot do!
The mountains are His, the rivers are His
The stars are His handiwork too!
My God is so big, so strong, and so mighty
There's nothing my God cannot do, for you!

In the midst of a hard day, I found myself thinking about my niece singing this song with all her might. When she sings it, she puts emphasis on the characteristics of who God is by screaming BIG, STRONG, and MIGHTY! She knows some pretty simple, yet fundamental, truths about the God of the universe!

Today was hard, but not hard enough for God. He has it all under control and just thinking about my sweet Ella singing that song made me realize that I was too consumed with my hard day to remember those truths. I was reminded tonight from God's Word, that He doesn't need me, for anything! He is self-sufficient! He measures the oceans in the palm of His hand, universe in the span of His fingers. He is bigger, stronger, and mightier than my feeble mind can conceive. He has it all under control. How? Because He is God! Why? All for His glory! When? At all times! Why is it such a struggle for me to let go of control and let God handle my life?! That is a much-needed break that He offers for me, and I neglect to allow Him to do so! He's not done with me yet! God is so good... :)

If I were hungry, I would not tell you,
for the world and its fullness are Mine.
Psalm 50:12

Praise Is Due Him...

2007-04-20T15:02:00.000-07:00

So, it's been a rough, frustrating week. Class is coming to an end, which means finals. Work is always hectic, apparently the world would stop if there were no greeting cards. And school is chaotic for the next month, preparing children for kindergarten is not as easy as you think and, as crazy as it sounds, 4-year-olds have bad weeks sometimes! Needless to say, I have been stressed and, to make matters worse, I met with my department head Wednesday and found out some news I was not expecting to hear regarding my academic plans. With that said, I was grateful to wake up this morning and know that I was 24 hours away from the weekend. A much needed break from life.

Then, while dwelling in my self-pity and pondering my horrible week, this song came on. It's called I Will Sing and it is on my choir tour cd. Yeah, God uses some pretty random things to remind us that He is still on His throne and in charge of life, no matter how bad (that's a relative term) things are. I was brought to tears as I sat in my car and sang the chorus. God is bigger than my bad weeks and He has a plan for my life. He doesn't owe me any answers for why things happen the way they do. Life will never seem fair or make sense to me, but God sees the whole puzzle already put together, I don't. My response to Him should not change with my circumstances. I owe Him praise, not because of what He does, but for what He did and who He is. He is worthy! Pray for me! God is so good... :)

Lord You are good and I will sing

Your mercy endures, it's everlasting

Lord You are good and I will sing

A song of worship

Lord You are worthy to receive

Dominion and power honor and majesty

Lord You are good and I will sing

Of Your great love

Certain Uncertainty...

2007-04-09T17:00:00.000-07:00

The heart of man plans his way,

but the Lord establishes his steps.

Proverbs 16:9

As I approach the end of this semester and begin the upward climb into my senior year (!!!!!) of college, I have gotten alot of questions about my future lately. And to be quite honest, that word (senior) and those questions, they SCARE me big time! For me to be so close to the end, I don't feel like I know any more about my future than I did when I started a few years ago. So, needless to say, I feel somewhat anxious and overwhelmed when I get questions like "What are your plans after graduation?" and "How long have you been interested in this field as a career?" And honestly, I don't know exactly how to answer questions like that, which I think may be the cause of my anxiety.

For those of you who know me, you know that all I have ever wanted for my life was a family. I want to be a wife and submit to and serve my husband. I want to be a mom and serve and teach my children. I want my husband to be a man of great integrity and known in our town as a man of incredible faith and discipline in the Word of God. I want the next great wave of preachers and missionaries to come from my home. I want my home to a place of worship, all hours of the day. I want the world to look upon my family and not see me or my husband or my children, but to see our pursuit to be more like Christ. May they look at us and see the cross that offers grace and hope and peace. I want my family to be a living, breathing representation of the power of Jesus Christ to save! Those are my plans after graduation.

But did you catch that all-important word in the last sentence you read? That is what I want. But at what point in Scripture does Jesus Christ ask my opinion about what I want? Oh that's right...NEVER! So, for now, I am learning how to wait. I am learning how to focus all of my attention on the cross and throne of Christ and waiting for Him to lead me in the right direction. I am learning how to trust the Lord with ALL my heart. I am learning how to be content with being single. I am learning how to apply the Word of God to my life now, so that when the time comes for me to be and do all of those things that I listed above, I will know how to do it from a Biblical, God-centered, Christ-exalting standpoint. I am learning how to be more like Jesus, which in turn will allow me to be the "wife of noble character" that I so desire to be. I am just me, just learning, just trusting, just loving, just waiting, just allowing Jesus to prepare me for the next season of life. Jenn Stinn once said, "The best way to be prepared for what God has for you in the future, is to be walking with the Lord today!" That pretty much sums it up! I am just trying to allow the Lord to prepare my heart for the plans He has for me after graduation. Pray for me! God is so good... :)

Happy Easter...

2007-04-07T15:27:00.000-07:00

Oh death, where is your victory?

Oh death, where is your sting?

1 Corinthians 15:55

This song, How Deep The Father's Love For Us, paints any incredible picture of what Easter is all about. Forget the rabbits and eggs, the big dinners and candy, focus on the cross of Christ. This season stands as a reminder of the great price that was paid for us. Let us not blaspheme this time with our own silly traditions and distractions. It's all about the persecution, death, burial, and resurrection of our SAVIOR!! God is soo good... :)

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The Father turns His face away

As wounds which mar the Chosen One

Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon a cross
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Urgency...

2007-03-23T13:47:00.000-07:00

Have you ever read something over and over and it's never really struck you?! But then, you read it at some other point and the message rings loud and clear, almost like the words jump off the page and kick you in the face?! Yeah, that was my experience yesterday! It wasn't fun, but it was eye-opening and convicting to understand God's Word on a level that I had never reached before.

I can't tell you how many times I have read Matthew 24, when Jesus talks about the end times, the destruction of the temple, and the Great Tribulation. But out of nowhere, while reading this passage yesterday, I came across verse 14 and I was blown away! Not only was I excited to find something that I have apparently overlooked for years, but I was convicted about the laziness of my own heart to share the Gospel of Christ. Seriously, read it! That verse says,

And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed
throughout the whole world as a testimony
to all nations, and then the end will come.
- Matthew 24:14

Think about it for just a moment. Study those words. Are you starting to understand the absolute and total urgency for the gospel to go out to all of the world. What this verse is saying is that until all nations hear, the end will not come! I mean, I don't know where you stand, but I want Jesus to come back ASAP! So, what can I do help?! Well, a positive start would be obedience to the Word of God by telling others. I can put aside myself and my desires and be a disciple. I can get off my butt and share the Word. I can pray for the workers of the harvest. I can send new workers to the harvest. I can go plant the seeds and be a part of helping the harvest happen! Whatever I do, I can do it all for the glory of my KING! And I can do it with a joyful and expectant heart. Joyful because He has given me an incredible opportunity and great privilege to take part in declaring His name to the world! Something He could just snap His fingers and do on His own, but He allows me to take part! Expectant because He is powerful and can change the hearts of those who hear His Word.

I cannot wait until the day when all the nations have heard the sweet name of our Savior. Then, and only then, can I rest. I can rest because on that day, He will come to take me home! The day when I see my Jesus return to claim me can't come soon enough! Go into all the world, my friends! He is mighty to save the nations! May His Kingdom be exalted and expanded and His name be glorified! God is so good... :)

Filled...

2007-03-21T21:23:00.000-07:00

Can I just say that God is stinkin INCREDIBLE!! He is so good and so worthy of praise! As I stood in the fellowship hall tonight, in the midst of worship, I realized that I have nothing to offer! My life, it is of no use to His kingdom if it has anything to do with me! As we sang the following song, my arms raised to the ceiling, my hands opened and empty, it doned on me that the only way Christ will ever get any glory from my life is for me to stay that way, open and empty, reaching out to Him. In His oh so loving and subtle ways, God reminded me that empty hands and an open heart that cry out before the throne of God is all He is asking for. For only then, can He fill me! He is able to do it all! Praise the Lord that He is big and mighty. He is requires so little, yet bestows so much! Friends, we serve a faithful and gracious and loving King! God is so good... :)

So I’ll stand

With arms high and heart abandoned

In awe of the One who gave it all

I’ll stand

My soul Lord to You surrendered

All I am is Yours

So Sweet...

2007-03-19T16:44:00.000-07:00

For as the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are My ways higher than your ways

and My thoughts than your thoughts.

Isaiah 55:9

Lately, primarily meaning the past week and weekend, I have really struggled with trusting God in every little aspect. I have been faced with issues that have nothing to do with me, but that have ROCKED my world in too many ways. But, as always, God has been so faithful and gracious to show mercy and lead me back toward His throne. He has given me so many opportunities to re-establish my foothold in His word and on His promises and He has taught me many lessons through the examples of Godly friends and their lives that echo His. I have been reminded that none of this life is about Sarah and how much easier things would be if I would just lean on His cross and give my burdens and worries of this world to Him. He doesn't need help running my life and I forget that far too often. Oh how I hate learning the same lessons over and over. I pray that God would give me the mindset of Isaiah in times like these to proclaim the power of God in my life. Praise the Lord that his mercies never cease and He continues to restore my soul. He is faithful and worthy of all praise! God is so good...... :)

Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus

Just to take Him at His word

Just to rest upon His promise

Just to know 'Thus saith the Lord'

Absence...

2007-02-22T21:19:00.000-08:00

Teach me Your way, oh Lord, and I will walk

in Your truth. Give me an UNDIVIDED

heart that I may fear Your name.

Psalm 86:11

So, as most of you know, we (LBC) are in the midst of the downhill descent of the Thailand mission trip. Amongst the 242 workers that went to serve East Asian missionaries and their families were, not only co-workers and church leaders, but also some of my closest and dearest friends. Friends that I rarely go more than two days without seeing and speaking to. Friends that mean the world to me. So, needless to say, my life has been quiet and somewhat lonely as of late. But, in the midst of this loneliness, I have found myself learning how to intercede on a more intimate, urgent level. I have re-learned how to talk to God about my problems and cry out to Him alone when I am struggling and just need a friend to listen. And I have strengthened some relationships with friends that, too, are longing to have the team back on the plains.

I had such an encouraging conversation with one of those friends this evening and I can’t even begin to put into words how much I have learned from this friend. She is wise beyond her years and teaches me with her lifestyle and her contagious love for JESUS!! She and I discussed how much we both have really struggled with selfishness over the past few weeks. How we long to, not only be a part of the group, but to hear more updates, to see more pictures, to get more phone calls, etc. What a blessing to hear that I am not the only one that longs for and struggles with these issues. It is our prayer that as we notice this selfishness that we confess it and then turn from it. That our prideful hearts will learn how to truly be excited about how God is working in the lives of those that we love. That we will be grateful for our friends that are willing and available to serve and be used by our King. And, that we will be encouraged by their obedience to follow the Lord’s call on their lives to take the gospel to the NATIONS!!

And then, in all His sovereignty, God placed the 4th verse of the hymn Amazing Grace on my heart and in my head. Those words put all of life for any Christian into perspective.

The Lord has promised good to me

His word my hope secures.

He will my Shield and Portion be

As long as life endures.

They say, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” But I say, “Absence makes the heart see the importance of not placing one’s hope in other people.” Yes, I miss my friends, but praise the Lord that I have learned the vitality of finding my hope in Christ alone, who alone is worthy! Trust the Lord, my friends, only He sustains and satisfies our hearts! Continue to pray for those in Thailand until March 2. God is doing a work there that only He is big enough to conjure up. He alone is WORTHY of all praise! Oh how I long for the day when I can meet the missionaries that my friends ministered to. Men and women of God that I have prayed for for over a year. One day we will meet at the throne of Christ. Oh how that can’t come soon enough! God is so good…. :)

Hit Your Knees....

2007-02-02T13:36:00.000-08:00

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not

know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit

Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

Romans 8:26

Recently, I have really found myself engulfed in a spirit of intercession. As many of you may know, I have been praying for my father's salvation for a number of years and seen no results. I mean, sometimes, I really just feel like giving up because I have become so burnt out. But then, in the midst of my struggle with this issue, we study Abraham's intercession for Sodom in Genesis 18. Now, just a brief summary. Abraham and his wife Sarah have been given a promise by the Lord. God has promised that Abraham will be the "father of multitude of nations," but he and Sarah have no children and are well past child-bearing age. So, in Gen 18, the Lord comes and reveals to them that Sarah will bear a child. Then, later in the chapter, the Lord makes mention of Sodom and the ruin that is coming for the city. Now, coincidentally, Lot, Abraham's nephew, and his family live in Sodom. The Lord says that He is planning on destroying the city of Sodom and Abraham, in an almost unreal way, bargains with the Lord to not destroy the city if He finds 10 righteous people there. (Lot and his family = 10 people)

Now, Abraham has just painted for us the most INCREDIBLE picture of intercession. He took a chance and stood in the gap between Sodom and the Lord and he pleads for the city. He knew that there was an urgent need, and thus, he interceded. His intercession for Lot and the city of Sodom was persistent and specific, but not presumptuous! And because he cared about the spiritual state and lack of relationship that they had with the Father, he chose to put his neck on the line for them. He poured himself out in prayer for those people. And what happened?

Well, we read in chapter 19 that the Lord did not find 10 righteous people in Sodom, so He destroyed the city. But, in His mercy, He spared Lot and 2 of his daughters. Then, it goes on to talk about Abraham watching the city of Sodom be destroyed. Now, what do you think? Was Abraham's intercession for Sodom and Lot in vain?! NO WAY!! God was glorified in the destruction of Sodom and God was exalted in the intercessory prayers of Abraham.

The same goes for you and me. When you seem like you have prayed and prayed for the same thing or person over and over and still see no results, just remember to press on. Intercession is not about the prayer or the prayed, it is about the glory of God! When we learn to hit our knees, that is when God is exalted high. Yes, it is easy to become discouraged and burnt out, but don't. On your knees before the throne of God in sweet conversation with the King of the universe is the most sacred place anyone could ever find themselves. Friends, let's humble ourselves and lift others up to our King. I feel like I have prayed for my dad's salvation far too long for far too few results, but I still do it! And I am determined to stay on my knees for my dad until he comes to know the Lord or Jesus picks me up and takes me home, because while Jesus was here on earth, and even now in Heaven on the throne, He intercedes for me. Be encouraged! God is big enough to hear and respond to the prayers of His people! God is so good... :)

In the Stillness...

2007-01-14T19:43:00.000-08:00

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him…
Psalm 37:7

So, tonight begins LBC’s weeklong Call to Prayer and Fasting. Brother Al, our faithful and God-fearing pastor, preached a powerful sermon last Sunday from Revelation 3. It speaks of the lukewarmness of the church at Laodicea and how that church became one of disgrace and disgust to our Lord. Feeling as though we are marching down the same path as a congregation, Bro. Al called our church to a week of prayer and fasting - prayer as a body every evening of this week from 6-7, fasting from media (internet, music, television, secular literature), and fasting from meals, rather than eat spend breakfast, lunch, or dinner with the Lord. And as I sit in the stillness and silence of my apartment writing this note, I don’t really know what God has in store for LBC this week, but I do know what I hope He accomplishes in my own heart.

I feel that in my own life right now, I have become far too ill content with where God has me. I want to move on to the next level. I am bored with being a 22-year-old single, college woman and I am ready to just move on. Now, am I wrong for that? I think that, in this particular situation, there is a fine line between being wrong and sinning. I feel that it is not wrong, necessarily, for me to desire new things for my life, but when my joy is no longer found in Christ alone and I become apathetic and, to some degrees, angry about my current status, that is when I sin. It doesn’t become a question of sin until my attitude no longer reflects Christ. I also feel that if I have to force myself to be joyful with where God has me, that too crosses the sin line. I shouldn’t have to force myself to be joyful with where God has me, I should just be joyful that God has me, period, the end!

It is my prayer, that by the end of this week, my heart no longer looks forward to tomorrow with desiring eyes, but that I look at each day as an opportunity to trust God and glorify Him as a 22-year-old single, college woman. Because the truth of the matter is, when this ship has sailed, I won’t ever have the opportunity to do that again. Once I graduate college and get married and start having babies, I will have to trust God and glorify Him as a wife and a mother. It is also my prayer that when I find myself becoming ill content with my current standing in life, that I will just fall at the foot of the cross and make that my dwelling place. That I will neglect my bad attitude and just spend some quality time at the feet of my King, my Father, my Savior! Oh that things not be about Sarah, but about Christ and Him crucified, magnified, and glorified.

As I sit silently at my computer, I can’t help but reflect on the words of the first verse of the worship song In The Secret.

In the secret, in the quiet place
In the stillness, You are there.
In the secret, in the quiet hour I wait
Only for You, cause I want to know You more!

I pray that this week not only brings a revival within the body of Lakeview, but in each individual heart, because that is where it all begins. Please pray for me/with me this week! God is so good... :)

Slacker Doesn’t Begin to Describe Me…

2007-01-14T19:42:00.000-08:00

First, let me preface this post with an apology to my loyal readers. I have not posted in almost 2 months and, for that, I apologize. This is not a valid excuse, but life has just been so hectic for me as of late.

A quick update, things are going well. I spent Christmas at home with my family and I enjoyed every minute of it. I am a blessed individual and I forget that FAR too often. I spent New Years in Auburn with friends that I wouldn’t trade for the world. I am so grateful for them! Not only did I start preschool back on the 8th, but CLASS also! I am so excited to be back in class this semester. I am taking 10 hours a week, still teaching preschool, and still working at the Hallmark store. Pray for me that God would grant me the grace and discipline that I need to get all of my work done, to the glory of His name. God is so good… :)

Eternal Perspective...

2006-11-24T14:03:00.000-08:00

Have you not known? Have you not heard? The

Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of

the earth. He does not faint or grow weary;

His understanding is unsearchable.

Isaiah 40:28

Let me just paint this picture! As I sit in the dining room of our condo with the balcony door open, I gaze out the window and reflect on God's glory and sovreignty and, in reality, a perfect picture of God's unending grace! As I listen to the waves crash and watch the ripples of the ocean, I can't help but think that God's love is so much wider and deeper than the vast ocean in front of me! While veiwing this world's paradise, I can't help but think of the true Paradise that awaits me and reflect upon how incredibly blessed I am. I am so thankful for the things that I have been granted and I pray that I not be a bad steward of those gifts. God is so gracious to me and my family!

I have spent the last several days with my family, 16 people, at the beach. It has been a fun time of fellowship with family and a great time of refreshment from the hustle and bustle of this hectic world! The serenity, the calm, the breath of fresh air that the sand and sea bring, I can't adequately describe the scene. As far as my eye can see, from a three story balcony, I compare the view to nothing but the grace of God. His grace has stretched beyond the distance of this ocean and more numerous than the sands on the shore to cover my sin and shame. And just as the sun rises and falls each morning and night, displaying the awesomeness of God's promsise to restore new mercies each day, I rise and consider the blessing that I have been bestowed. I don't deserve His grace, yet so richly given. I can't comprehend His love, yet so sacrificially displayed on Calvary's cross. This side of glory, I will never understand the sovreignty of God, but praise the Lord that He has not called me to understand it! I am called to live by it. To turn from myself and this world each day and proclaim the love of Christ and Him crucified and by the grace of God alone, I have that strength each day. Just as the sunrise restores light to the day and the sunset restores calm to the night, He restores my soul each day.

In the midst of these next few weeks of holiday season, may we be truly grateful, not for the things we have, but the for the ONE that paid it all for us. Yes, I am thankful each day for my family, my mom, my siblings, my precious niece, and I am thankful for the "stuff" that I have, but none of that means anything without acknowledging the price that was paid for me, for my wretched soul. May God continually remind me of the cost of sin, the grace that abounds like the sea, and the promises that outnumber the sands. He alone is the Creator of this beautiful masterpiece in front of me, and He alone is worthy of all glory and honor for the beauty that it brings. That really gives "going to the beach" an eternal perspective. God is so good... :)

WAR EAGLE!!

2006-11-17T17:31:00.000-08:00

So, I know this is a very atypical blog from me, but I am super pumped about tomorrow's game and I ran across the funniest thing and wanted to share it with all the Auburn beloved!! I hope you get some laughs from this! FEAR THE THUMB...WAR EAGLE!! haha!! :)

The Alabama Creed:
We believe that this is a delusional world and that we can talk only about what Bear did. Therefore, we believe in the past, the distant past.
We believe in education, and though we did not technically attend the University of Alabama, we know a guy that did.
We believe in honesty and truthfulness, because when the punishment for marijuana possession is ice cream, there is really no need to lie.
We believe in a sound mind, in a sound body and a spirit that is not afraid... except maybe a little of thumbs.
We believe in obedience to law, except for the ones concerning money laundering, because they hinder recruiting.
We believe in the human touch, even if we have to pay for it at seedy Pensacola strip clubs.
We believe in our Country, because it is a land of freedom, and where else on Earth could a man wearing a gold chain earn two million dollars a year losing football games.
And because Alabama men and women believe in these things, We believe in Alabama (football) and love it, when we are winning.

Friends...

2006-11-14T17:26:00.000-08:00

A man of many companions may come to ruin,
but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24

WOW!! What a crazy week the past seven days have been! I feel like I have been on a friendship roller coaster and, frankly, I am ready for this ride to come to a HALT!! This past week has been one of refreshing and fun beginnings, joyful ups, hurtful downs, and plenty of drama-filled loops! Now, don't get me wrong, I love roller coasters, but not this one. And I'm not really sure what God is wanting me to learn through this, but I trust that He is using these stressful situations to sharpen me and draw me more unto Himself, and for that, I am so thankful!

(First the good!) I am in the midst of developing several new friendships with a few college girls that are younger than me and I am so excited to see what will come of those. So often, I find that it is harder to develop lasting relationships with people younger than oneself because they are, at times, in different seasons of life. Not to say that it is impossible, just hard. But I think that these few friendships that are in the works are definitely worth the effort. I am excited about my new friends and can't wait to get to know them better. No telling what God has in store for our friendship!

(Now the bad that turned to good!) I have this friend, whom I love dearly, that was on the verge of being erased from my life based on the way in which they treated me. It got to the point that I would just rather not have this person in my life at all, disassociate myself from them and any activity that involved them, than to continue to be put down and treated poorly by this person. No need for details, just to say that I felt like I had tried so hard to be their friend and all I ever got was enemy-like treatment in return and, after putting up with that for literally months, decided it was not beneficial for me to continue to call this person "friend." So, after an all-together hurtful afternoon with this person and an evening filled with crying out to God and others for advice and help, I came to the conclusion that it was no longer worth my time to even try. But, the very next day, God proved that He, not my friends, was the ultimate voice of decision in my life and breakthrough occured! I recieved an apology from this person and a truly remarkable plea for our friendship. Stunning how God reveals Himself through difficult situations! And now, the best news from that story, I HAVE MY FRIEND BACK!!

(Now the bad that hasn't turned to good yet, but I trust God!) So, in the midst of all the other friend drama, there was only one person that knew the situation. This person pretty much knows all that goes on in my life, to the extent of talking on the phone at least 3 times a day! And I'm not really sure what happened, but for some reason we haven't said one word to each other since Saturday evening. I mean, I don't if it was my fault, their fault, or what, but I do know that it has been a miserable 72 hours without my friend. I want so badly to not handle this over the phone, but I don't know if I will see them before tomorrow and that may kill me! It is has been my prayer that God would reveal to me the issue at hand and that restitution will be made. I love this friend and truly desire for us to be friends for life and I just want so badly for us to work this out! Pray for me/us!

I have been so blessed in my life to have some truly incredible friends. Friends that know me and are known by me. Each one of my friends has heard me say that I would GLADLY do anything for them and I mean that. Without my friends, I would be so lost. But even in the midst of friend crisis and drama and total melt-down, there is one friend that has never left my side. Jesus Christ has exemplified for me what a true friend looks like and, for that, I am so grateful. I am not at all perfect, but He continues to love me and call me "friend" and I can't, for the life of me, figure out why He loves me and wants to be a part of my life. But I am more than thankful for it! God is so good.... :)

Greater love has no one than this, that
someone lays down his life for his friends.

John 15:13

Happy Day...

2006-11-06T20:20:00.000-08:00

I don't think I will ever forget the sequence of events. I didn't know then, but I see now that God's hand was over all that took place. And all of it was for His glory alone and the advancement of His Kingdom. In the midst of great hardship, God revealed Himself as the one, true, living, merciful, and gracious God who is capable of saving the entire world. Not only is He capable, but He has already provided the means and is longing for intimate followers. And when I say longing, I don't mean "in need," but rather, seeking out, pursuing those that He longs to call Beloved. Here is my story.....

I don't think there is a single American that has yet forgotten that day. Where I sat and my first reactions have forever been etched in my mind. I remember it like it just happened. First period had just ended and as I walked into homeroom, I just had a gut feeling that things weren't right. There was a buzz around the campus that I had never noticed before. I sat down and my classmates began reporting what they had heard and seen on television and radio. My first reaction, "That is a sick joke!" Then, our principal came over the PA and made the announcement that, yes, in fact, our nation had come under attack. The mood on my high school campus was quite somper and real for the remainder of the day.

The first stop I made on my way home from school that day was to my youth pastor's home. You see, his wife, Paula, and I were prayer partners and I really just had some pressing matters that needed to be made known. There was not a soul that knew, but prior to the attacks on 9/11, I had been seriously struggling with my salvation. I mean, I was the last person you would expect to hear that from. So, I continued my role as "Christian" and totally ignored my struggles and continued to live for myself while claiming Chirst in my everyday life. In pursuit to "prove" my salvation to my church body, I rose and headed to the microphone at a church-wide prayer meeting the Wednesday after the attacks. That's right, hundreds had just lost their lives and so many more were hurting and here we were to meet and pray for the heart of our country and its leaders and the most important thing to me was ME! Prideful and ready to show everyone how "spiritual" I was, I prayed using big words and Bible terms, and secretly, I gave myself a nice little pat on the back as I walked back to my seat. And for me to have prayed such an "amazing" prayer that evening, there is only one phrase I can remember. At one point, I said "Thank you, God, for our second chances." Not really knowing what I was talking about, in the weeks to come, that phrase rang so true as God's story of salvation in my life unfolded.

In the next several weeks, still avoiding the matter at hand (my salvation), life was not fun! God used every sermon, every Sunday School lesson, every song on Christian radio, etc. to convict me of sin. Slowly, but very surely, in His own timing, He was drawing me to the end of myself and into His light. Then, only because I thought I would get a break from all the conviction, I attended a youth prayer meeting one Wednesday evening. As I sat in the room that we affectionately called "The Upper Room," God used a faithful servant's prayer to open my eyes and break the wall of sin that I had so neglected to acknowledge. As Ben prayed, he quoted Matthew 7:21-23, and I knew that was me. God had just used Ben to paint a very clear picture of my life. I was the one that walked an aisle and was baptized at age 9, came to church every opportunity available, claimed Christ when I was with other believers, but lived for myself when I was alone. And in that moment, I knew that I was a sinner and I had never made Him Lord of my life. It was there, on Wednesday, Nov 7, 2001, in all my weakness that I cried out for my Father. I humbled myself and fell to the foot of His cross and cried out for mercy. And it was in that humility that I found grace and mercy and redemption. In that moment, I was clothed with Christs' righteousness for eternity! PRAISE BE TO GOD!!

Now, looking back over the past 5 years, I can't say that it has always been great. But I can say, it has definately been worth it! If I had 1000 lives to live, I would give every one of them to Jesus! He has changed my life. I can't imagine that I would be here today if that night hadn't happened. And I am so grateful to my Jesus for not leaving me. I tried so hard to run away, but He tried harder to win my heart. He has done it. And the fact that He puts up with me, that blows my mind! He is so faithful and good. He deserves all the praise and glory for seeking me out and providing me with my second chance. What a mighty God we serve! God is so good.... :)

The Lord is not slow to fulfill His promise as

some count slowness, but is patient

toward you, not wishing that any should perish,

but that all should reach repentance.

2 Peter 3:9

Bring It On....

2006-10-19T18:16:00.000-07:00

After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one

could number, from every nation, from all tribes and

peoples and languages, standing before the throne and

before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm

branches in their hands, and crying out with a loud voice,

“Salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to

the Lamb!” And all the angels were standing around the throne

and around the elders and the four living creatures, and they

fell on their faces before the throne and worshiped God,

saying, "Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and

honor and power and might be to our God forever and ever! Amen.”

Revelation 7:9-12

All I have to say about this song, Sing To The King, is BRING IT ON!!

Sing to the King who is coming to reign
Glory to Jesus, the Lamb that was slain
Life and salvation His empire shall bring
And joy to the nations when Jesus is King

Come, let us sing a song
A song declaring that we belong to Jesus
He is all we need
Lift up a heart of praise
Sing now with voices raised to Jesus
Sing to the King

For His returning we watch and we pray
We will be ready the dawn of that day
We'll join in singing with all the redeemed
Cause Satan is vanquished and my Jesus is King

Oh how I long for the day when all people from EVERY tribe and nation, saved and unsaved, bow at the foot of the throne, before the King of Kings, to exalt Him and lift up a sweet aroma of praise to our Savior! That day can't come fast enough! It is my prayer that while I wait for that day, my time spent here will all be in preparation for an eternity of singing praises to my Jesus!! He alone is worthy! God is so good.... :)

Be A Tree...

2006-10-10T12:13:00.000-07:00

Therefore, humble yourselves under

the mighty hand of God, that He

may exalt you in due time.

1 Peter 5:6

I recently read this article by David Skidmore and have been challenged in many ways. I encourage you to read it and apply it your life as well! In the article, Becoming The Sycamore Tree, he tells us how we can be the forgotten fourth character of the well-known Bible story about Zacchaeus. The biggest lesson that I have learned from this atricle is the need and importance to remain humble as you serve others. I mean, it isn't a glamourous job being a tree, but somebody has to do it! Only after we humble ourselves, then and only then, Christ will be exalted! All glory to Him who alone is worthy! God is so good..... :)

Blurred Vision...

2006-10-09T20:10:00.000-07:00

Declare His glory among the nations,

His marvelous works among all the peoples!

Psalm 96:3

Just to preface this post, I would like to say that if one more person looks at me and condescendingly says, "Everyone is called," I may lose it! With that said, on with the post!

I know that everyone is "called" to take the gospel to the world, but when I speak of whether or not I am "called" to be a missionary, I am referring to my occupation. And right now, I don't yet feel that I have been called to be a full-time missionary, occupationally. This week at Lakeview we are in the midst of our annual International Missions Festival. It is probably my most favorite, in an intense and completely hard sort of way, week of the year. This year especially, because my heart and mind have been opened to the possibility to accept a call to the mission field, is filled with questions and uncertainty. Each day, as I sit and listen to the stories of various missionaries at lunch and dinner, I can't help but think about whether God is calling me to serve with them. It's so easy for others, yet I struggle so much with the decision.

Now, don't get me wrong, I am absolutely willing to go and I want to be obedient to where the Lord is calling me, but I just don't know where that is yet. Some people, like TL, know their calling and have accepted it without hesitation or regret. And it's not that I am hesitating, it's just that my vision is a bit blurred at the moment. I mean, I know that I have a heart for missions, but where? TL knows that she is called to Africa and use her training as a nurse and childlife counselor to share the Gospel with the people of that continent. Its seems as though she just has it all together. But then there's me. I know that I am called to be a wife and a mother and that I long to, through being a wife and mom, serve my family and church. That's just about it. I don't know that I will ever use my training in Social Work. At least, until Sunday, I didn't think that I ever would....

On Sunday, Mike and Kay Johnson, missionaries to Kenya, spoke to the college students in the Sunday School hour. Having never truly felt a calling to do missions internationally, I was just interested in hearing their story and knowing how to pray, but as I sat there, my heart and my eyes and my mind were completely opened to the option of going to Kenya to serve under Mike and Kay Johnson in one of their ministries, A Prepared Place. As I listened to her share her vision for this ministry, my body was filled with chills. It is no secret to those that know me that my major is Social Work and in that, my emphasis is on the adoption and foster care systems. And it is also no secret that I have a passion toward domestic adoption. And as Mrs Johnson was sharing her heart for the orphan children of Kenya and her passion for domestic adoption, my heart and mind were filled with questions. Questions such as "Would there be any way that I could go to Kenya next year to complete my internship in the Social Work program?" I mean, am I called to Kenya to use my academic training for the glory of God and the good of the Kenyan children that have no family?!

But then, my heart returns to my first love. Our very own country. I have, for at least one year, had a deep desire for the heart of our nation, specifically the northeast (New York). A desire so intense, that I would be willing to pack my bags and leave for New York RIGHT NOW to live in the city and share the love of Christ with the people. Oh how I long to see our nation, which once rest its foundation on the Word of God, return to the Biblical knowledge of salvation and love for the body of Christ that it was founded on. It breaks my heart to see how far from the truths of the Word our nation has slipped and the decline only increases as the days, weeks, and years go on. America is a lost country in need of some willing hearts to STAY and finish the work here! Am I called to missions domestically?!

As you can see, this is a monumental week in the lives of those that long to be obedient to the call of Chirst. I plead with you to make it a matter of prayer on my behalf that God would reveal His heart and His will for me and my life on this matter. I want to follow Him wherever He leads. And right now, my vision on the matter of missions in my own life is blurred, but I pray that the true vision of my heart would not be blurred. I pray that I would see Christ and Him crucified and His glory and His heart each day. That I will set my eyes on the cross of Jesus Christ and on eternal matters and on things above and that my heart and mind would be at ease and trust God to do His work in my life. Oh that I would have a clear vision of the glory of Christ! Pray for me, pray with me! God is so good... :)

Through the Fire...

2006-10-02T20:38:00.000-07:00

For You have delivered my soul from death,

my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.

Psalm 116:8

So, I hear this song last night, called Through the Fire, at the How Great Is Our God fall choral musical at Lakeview and just moments into it, I have chills all over my body. I feel as though this is my life from the past summer and few months put to song. And, you know, I haven't really been able to accurately proclaim what lessons I have really learned through my recent struggles and trials, but this song HITS THE NAIL ON THE HEAD! God is good and always will be. He knows what's best for me and His timing is impeccable!! He is God. I am not. Will I ever learn that lesson?! I pray that I have allowed this to soak in and it is now time to move on to bigger and better spiritual matters! I don't want to struggle with this any longer. I am giving it to JESUS! God is so good...

(ps...just the lyrics don't do the song justice! and this is just the chorus!)

He never promised that the cross would not get heavy
And that the hill would not be hard to climb
He never offered our victories without fight
But He said help would always come in time

So just remember when you’re standing in the valley of decision
And the adversary says give in
Just hold on! Cause my Lord will show up

And lead you through the fire again

So Long Sarah...

2006-09-30T08:35:00.000-07:00

Recently, I have really been struggling with trying to figure out my purpose here in Auburn. For a while, I have just really felt like my time here had come to an end and it was time to move on to new things. New places, new people, new church, new EVERYTHING!! I really felt like I needed to go some place where noone knew me and just start anew; a fresh start. I spent several days re-evaluating my purpose and really felt like my time here had come to an end. But then, I got some wise words from a close friend and a new perspective on the issue at hand...my purpose in Auburn.

While speaking with a friend, who had spent several days in prayer about the matter on my behalf, my eyes were opened to a new perspective. Maybe I am done here. "I" being the key word. I am done, but God is not. God is not done with me and the only way for Him to work in me is for me to be no more. No more Sarah, just God. It is time for me to say goodbye to myself and allow God to use me here and I think all this "moving on" stuff was really just Satan's way of making me think that running away from a difficult situation would solve the problem. But it won't! God needs me here. I do have a purpose. My purpose is God's glory alone.

This Tuesday, I went to FAITH class with Terri Leigh and I am so glad that I got to go. Of all things, we talked about how Satan uses our own minds and thoughts to create spiritual warfare. How ture is that! The only reason Satan knows what we are thinking and is able to play his mind games on us is because we let him! We let him know our thoughts and he just twists them around and uses them to make us think crazy things!! Satan is deceptive and scheming and will do whatever he can to hurt us. We can't let him know our thoughts. We must guard our minds and hearts against the enemy.

After speaking with my friend and learning ways to not allow the enemy into my mind, I really started to think about the effect, negative, that I would have on Auburn by leaving. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not praising myself in any way, but I believe that there are people here that count on me and need me here. For instance, I know for a fact that there are 5 youth girls that know and love me and count on me each week to lead them and disciple them. What would they do if I just up and left? It would be so unfair to them for me to just selfishly leave them without a second thought or a reason. They are my purpose. And what about my 4-year-olds? Everyday, I step into the classroom and help teach 10 children about the world, about the Lord, about themselves. Watching and helping them learn each day is such a blessing to me. It brings me great joy to hear them recite Scripture and watch their faces as they learn new Bible stories and songs. What would they do if I just up and left? That wouldn't be fair to them, to their parents, or to my fellow teachers. They are my purpose.

These two things alone are part of my purpose in Auburn. My ulimate goal and reason for existance in life is to give God glory. It is glorifying to the Father when I lead my girls each week and my 4-year-olds each day. I do have a purpose and regardless of where I am, that will never change. God has called me here and I am prepared to stay here and do His work until my time here is done. Its not about me, my pride, my feelings, or my selfishness, it's all about JESUS! I pray that I will be content with where God has me and be grateful for the opportunities that He gives me each day. My city, state, surroundings, and situations will change, but my purpose never will. Make me aware of Your goodness and sovreignty. You are worthy of glory. God is so good.... :)

Presidential Luncheon...

2006-09-29T12:10:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, I had the honor of attending a campaign luncheon for Gov. Bob Riley called "A Salute To George W Bush" in Birmingham, AL. I had a great time and will forever be grateful for the opportunity to hear our president address the politicians of Alabama. I will never forget this day! God is so good.... :)

Enough...

2006-09-17T14:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I have been learning lately that Jesus is enough for me! I don't know why it has taken me so long to figure it out, but I have now. I have found a song that helps me to more accurately describe this new discovery. It's, approriately, called Enough by Jeremy Camp. It is my prayer that this song will genuinely and precisely describe my heart until the day I die! Enjoy! God is so good.......

(Chorus)
All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
Still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
Worth living for
Still more aweesome than I know

Chorus

You are my supply
My breath of life
Still more awesome than I know
You're my coming King
You're my everything
Still more awesome than I know

Chorus

More than all I am
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough

Chorus

Satisfaction....

2006-09-11T21:32:00.000-07:00

Satisfy us in the morning with Your steadfast love,

that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.

Psalm 90:14

Lately, I have found myself really struggling with the present. Don't get me wrong, I love my life, but right now things are really hard for me. I am in new situations, and tough ones at that, and sometimes I just really loose myself thinking about being somewhere else. I find myself longing for the future, wishing for the past, and being extremely discontent with the present. Here are my explanations of those thoughts and my realization of God's sovereignty....

Some days, I just don't want to even crawl out of bed because life is pretty rough right now. I feel like I am constantly on the go (that happens when you have more than 2 jobs), I am growing further away from my friends than every thought possible, and I am always tired. Quite frankly, and extremely sinfully, life is just not fair for me this semester. I don't like it and I don't want to be a grown up yet. I don't think I ever could have imagined how hard it would be to live in Auburn and not be a student, and some days I am ready to just give up and go home. I want to wash my hands of this whole thing and quit!! Then, the enemy really begins to play games. I start thinking of how things used to be. Responsibilities just a few hours a day, hanging out with friends all night and weekend, living it up! The life of a college student doesn't get any better than here at Auburn University! I mean, beautiful campus, great atmosphere, incredible friends, and SEC football...what more could you ask for?!?! Those were the good days. And I often find myself wishing I could be back there; that this season of my life didn't exist. And then there are the days that I struggle with longing and desire for my future. Oh how my heart LONGS to be a wife. To be a mother. To serve my husband and my children and see how God will use me in the lives of those precious people. And if my heart so longs to be a wife and mother, why is it taking so long?! I want so badly for that season of my life to come and it is so hard for me to be still and just wait.

And then finally, reality wakes me up! I am here. I have been placed in this particular situation for a purpose...the glory of God! Yes, things look better and easier in the past, but that is not where God has me! And yes, I can't wait for the future, but that is not where God has me! God has me right here, RIGHT NOW, for a reason. And even though I don't understand why things are like they are or why things happen like they do, He does. And He doesn't owe me an answer. I have learned that "The grass is always greener on the other side" is false. Rather, if the grass on the other side looks greener, then you need to water your side more often! I have had to learn to live with the current hand that has been dealt. Even though I struggle and truly dislike the hand, I know whose hand it came from and I am learning to be content with the present. God is WAY bigger than my feeble mind can comprehend and I know that He is preparing me for the future and delivering me from my past and in that, I am satisfied.

Oh God, how I long to wake up each more and find myself satisfied in You and in Your word. Teach me to be content and joyful. Teach me to stop looking back and gazing forward, but rather to fix my eyes on things above. Teach me to be a good steward of this particular season that You have me in and to be grateful for Your promise to restore me each day. I know that You are sovereign and that You have Your best interest and Your glory in mind. Use my life and my heart to exalt Your name and Your kingdom! You alone are worthy! God is so good..... :)

Always...

2006-09-01T15:13:00.000-07:00

For great is His steadfast love toward us,

and the faithfulness of the Lord endures

forever. Praise the Lord!

Psalm 117:2

Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Morning by morning I wake up to find

The power and comfort of God’s hand in mine

Season by season I watch Him, amazed

In awe of the mystery of His perfect ways

All I have need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful to me.

I can’t remember a trial or a pain

He did not recycle to bring me gain

I can’t remember one single regret

In serving God only, and trusting His hand

All I have need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful to me.

This is my anthem, this is my song

The theme of the stories I’ve heard for so long

God has been faithful, He will be again

His loving compassion, it knows no end

All I have need of, His hand will provide

He’s always been faithful, He’s always been faithful

He’s always been faithful to me.

- He's Always Been Faithful

Sara Groves, Conversations

Weakness...

2006-08-31T14:30:00.000-07:00

Just for starters, I hate that I have friends that know me well enough to see that there is more going on in my life than I will admit at times. And yet, I LOVE YOU! (All of you know who you are....) So thanks! Thanks for having invested enough in my pitiful life to know me in my weaknesses and still put up with me! You are each an incredible blessing to my life! And with that said....let's move on!

Lately, I have been a bit stressed, if you didn't know. I have no problem admitting to that, but it does hurt my pride some when others can see that in me. It is a sign of weakness, as if to say "I can't handle life right now." But just yesterday, a friend of mine, who probably has no idea that they did this, really humbled me and reminded me that it isn't about me. In a conversation, after I had stated that I was stressed, this friend of mine asked, "But is Jesus still on His throne?" My response, "ABSOLUTELY!" Thanks! You really brought me back into perspective by reminding me that regardless of what is going on in my sad little life and of all the things that seem stressful to me, He is still a sovreign God who sits on His throne and is not surpirsed by anything that happens. In fact, He is using this time in my life to teach me so much about His character and to shape me into the woman He wants me to be. All that is happening in my life right now, it is for His glory and He has purposed it for that reason alone. Praise the Lord that He is so much bigger than my stress!

There are two sources that I have learned to cling to lately. The first is a verse found in a well-known worship song entitled Wonderful, Merciful Savior. The last verse of the song states...

Almighty, Infinite Father

Faithfully loving Your own

Here in our weakness You find us

Falling before Your throne.

WOW! That has been the story of my life as of late. I pray that I never leave the thone of Christ, weak or not. And the second source of strength as of late has been a verse in Paul's second letter to Timothy. Paul reminds Timothy that

"if we are faithless, He remains

faithful— for He cannot deny himself."

2 Timothy 2:13

Sometimes it's hard for me to understand and comprehend why God wouldn't just give up on me. I mean, I am not always faithful, and yet, He never gets aggravated and just quits! His love is steadfast and His mercy is renewed each morning. How great is our God! He is worthy of all the praise and glory! Thank you God for being patient with me in my weakness and still putting up with me. Help me to rely on You in my stressful times and never forget to lift all the glory to You. God is so good........ :)

Get Pumped....

2006-08-22T18:31:00.000-07:00

So, for those of you that don't know, I will be going to Cali in Feb for a conference and I AM PUMPED!! I am so jazzed about it and I would encourge each of you to check out the website and learn more about it and consider it an option for yourself. Take my word, you will experience serious growth in your walk with Christ. You will be challenged and return home changed. Check it out! Hope to see you there! God is so good........

http://www.gracechurch.org/Resolved/

Faithful Friend...

2006-08-16T21:26:00.000-07:00

No longer do I call you servants, for the

servant does not know what his master is

doing; but I have called you friends...

John 15:15

I have been learning a lot lately about the importance of friends. I have found myself clinging to the friendship of my Savior and praising God that I have been found worthy to be considered His friend. His friendship to me is an honor FAR beyond my own comprehension, but I can trust that He will always be faithful to me in our friendship. He will never get mad and walk away, He will never judge my flaws, and He will never replace me. He will forever be faithful when I am faithless, strong when I am weak, sufficient in my own insufficiency, fruitful when I am fruitless, and He is ready to listen and guide me at all times. He is not only the best friend I'll ever have, but He is my refuge, my help, my portion, my deliverer, my redeemer, etc. He is all I know and all I need. He holds the universe on His fingertip, and yet He still wants to be my friend.....

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.

Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
May we ever, Lord, be bringing all to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright unclouded there will be no need for prayer
Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there.

It is my prayer that I will no longer overlook the incredible friendship that comes from the Father. Who else will I ever need in this life? I pray that I will find satisfaction in being alone by the standards of this world and use that "alone time" to always reflect on the goodness and freindship of Jesus Christ. Who could ask for a better friend? I have no doubt that He will always have my back and willingly die for me, HE ALREADY HAS! He has given up so much to be my friend, what an honor! May I never take for granted this faithful friend. God is so good...... :)

The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear

Him, and He makes known to them His covenant.

Psalm 25:14

Worship...

2006-08-10T17:56:00.000-07:00

But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true

worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth,

for the Father is seeking such people to worship him.

John 4:23

Recently, I have been learning much about worship. What is worship? What isn't worship? What does worship look like? When is worship genuine? How often should one worship? At what point does worship turn from worship to ritual? What does a true worshipper look like, act like, talk like, live like? What or who is the best example of a true worshipper? Are you beginning to get the picture or should I go on?! I will spare you the redundancy and just get to the point.

So, what have I learned? It is only appropriate that a pupil be tested on what they have learned and leave it to our MIGHTY God to test me in ways that I never thought He would. Which, on a side note, just don't ever put God in a box! I mean, He can balance the entire universe on the tip of his finger, so there is no box big enough to hold Him! Back on track... I have learned that worship is a state of mind, it is a matter of the heart, it is done out of awe and not ritual. Worship is no joking matter. Some great Biblical examples of worshippers who walked with God through the pages of Scripture include, Isaiah, Job, Hannah, David, Jesus, and the list goes on. I have learned much about the different apects of life that worship becomes essential to. Not that worship is not important in every aspect, but the examples listed above show how to worship in the vital times, the dark days, the life or death matters. Worship bcomes essential in suffereing, in awe, in abandon, in warfare, in perseverance and humilty, and in Spirit. Basically, worship is not singing songs and dancing, worship is a lifestyle. So if you are living worship, then in all that you do, you will be giving praise to God. And for only one reason, HE ALONE IS WORTHY!

Lately, I have fallen in love with a cd by Phillips, Craig, and Dean, entitled Let the Worshippers Arise. It has such an incredible line-up of songs. I would have to rank it has one of my favorite worship albums. I recommend it to anyone that is in the market for a new worship cd.

1. Friend of God
2. Because I'm Forgiven
3. You Are God Alone
4. In Christ Alone (Medley)
5. Let The Worshippers Arise
6. My Redeemer Lives
7. Be The Praise Of My Heart
8. Awake My Soul (Christ Is Formed In Me)
9. Making Melody
10. Mighty Is The Power Of The Cross
11. Wonderful Merciful Savior

May all the praise and glory go to God alone because that is why I was created. He alone will be praised forever! May my heart forever be fixed on the cross of Christ and my worship forever be genuine! It is my prayer that my attitude and actions will always reflect the image of Chirst. Be glorified in my, oh Lord. I don't want this world to know me or my motives, but to bow before You and sing praises to You alone. Use me to exalt Yourself and glorify Your kindgom. You will forever be on Your throne and worthy of Your crown! God is so good....... :)

A Growing Desire...

2006-08-07T15:56:00.000-07:00

I don't know how to write this post. I want to share with you a developing desire, passion, if you will, that God has placed on my heart as of late, but I don't have any stories or analogies to help me this time. Not that I need one, because it is suffice to say that this is the Lord's hand over my life and working in my heart, but it just makes it easier for me to write and you to read if there is a fun story or whatnot to go along with it. But here goes (forgive me if the "flow" is not up to its usual par).......

Recently, meaning this summer, I have found myself falling in love with missions. You see, growing up, I never really knew a lot about missions. I mean, I knew what missionaries were and what they did, to an extent, but I never understood the concept of missions. I was one of those people that thought missions only existed in the farthest corners of the Earth and that the only way you could take part in missions was to sell everything and go into "the bush" and share the gospel with lost people. Pretty ridiculous, huh? But it was a matter of not being educated about the subject matter.

Now, I go to one of the nations most mission-minded churches and I have learned and grown to understand the truth of what missions are. My eyes have been opened and I now realize what it means to be a missionary. And this summer, I have grown to LOVE missions! I don't really know what that means at this point. I know two things. I know that right now, I am called to follow Christ anywhere He leads me and that right now that is Auburn, AL. I also know that He has a plan for my life and the ultimate purpose of that plan is to glorify Himself. But right now, I am so excited about the thought of sending laborers onto the field and even more excited about being one of those laborers!

So what am saying?! As of October 2005, I was dead-set in my way. I told several people that I felt no calling, nor had any desire, to be a life-time or an international missionary. At the time, and still presently, I had a very strong desire for our nation. But now, I really feel that God is opening my heart for the world, for the nations. I mean, it is to the point that I am in tears when I sing a song about "the nations" crying out one day. About "every tribe and tongue" bowing before the throne. I don't know what it means. I don't know if God is just softening my heart and making me aware how urgent the need is or if He is preparing my heart to accept a call to be involved in missions full-time. Am I one of the laborers of the harvest? Will I be one of the chosen to go to one of the unknown people groups in the world and make the Word of God famous among that nation? Am I the next Amy Carmichael or Corrie Ten Boom? Who knows...He does!

So now comes the fun part! I need your help in this matter. I sincerely ask that you make this a matter of prayer on my behalf. Pray that God's will for my life will be clear and that I will accept that without any questions. I know that it can be scary to step out on faith and go to the corners of the earth, but I pray that God will make my heart bold and will empower me with His Spirit to follow His calling for my life. I want Isaiah 6:8 to be a true reflection of my heart on this matter. I do not want to be found in disobedience to Him, and if He is calling me to be a worker for the Kingdom harvest, then I want to go! I want to do His work. Thank you for your petitions on my behalf. I am truly blessed by those of you that care enough to invest in my life. God is sooo good and He will be glorified.... :)

And I heard the voice of the Lord saying,

“Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?”

Then I said, “Here am I! Send me.”

Isaiah 6:8

Immanuel....

2006-07-29T16:03:00.000-07:00

"Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and
become like children, you will never
enter the kingdom of heaven."

Matthew 18:3

If you haven't already caught on, God really uses my job as a way to speak to me on a daily basis and remind of Himself through the children and situations that I deal with each day. Well, He was at it again yesterday afternoon. After having been at work for about 9 hours, I was staying with the last three children while their parents, who also work there, finished all the cleaning. In that time, a conversation between the two older children in the room took place and this is the extent of what was said...

4-year-old girl: "Are you afraid of anything? Monsters, creatures, the dark? Anything?"

6-year-old girl: "No, I am not afraid of anything."

4-year-old girl: "Why not? I am afraid of the dark sometimes."

6-year-old girl: "Because I know that God is always with me!"

I almost fell out of my seat! Once again, God has used an innocent child to break me of myself and gloryify the only One that is worthy. You see, I am in a situation now that I have never been in before. Come next Friday, I will no longer work at my current job and I have not yet found a new one. I put in my two week notice last Friday and I have submitted resume after resume and nothing has been secured yet. I have a few interviews this coming week and I am just trusting God that He knows my new job and has a plan to glorify Himself in the whole situation. With that said, I am still human and I am still a sinner. Yes, I have been redeemed, but I am not perfect yet. I still fall and I still struggle, but I know that God has my back and He is in control. But yesterday, I really caught myself worrying about the future. Will I have a job by August 7? Will I be able to pay all my bills next month if I don't have job by August 7? Is anyone going to call me back? Important questions, yes, but nothing to be worried about.

When I heard the 6-year-old's response, in that moment I thought to myself, "Sarah, you either trust God or you don't!" I realized that by worrying about that stuff and allowing that worry to consume me and my attitude, I was essentially relying on myself to meet my needs. But then, I heard, "I know that God is always with me!" What truth!! He has been given the name Immanuel, which means "God with us." He has promised to "never leave or forsake me" (Duet 31:8) and He has promised that "all things work together for good" (Rom 8:28). So who am I to doubt His promises. It comes down to, not only, a matter of trust, but, most importantly, a matter of Lordship! Do I trust God enough to say, "Here I am God, You know what I need and I am willing to do whatever You say. Lead me and provide for me in a manner that is pleasing and glorifying to Your name ALONE!" For the record, yes! I do trust God enough to say that! I can honestly say that He had to humble me yesterday and I had to have a "come to Jesus" with Jesus about the issue, but it's taken care of. He knows where I stand and it is no longer on my own selfish pride, but on the Word of God and the cross of His Son.

My life, my job, my future, they have all been covered by His blood and the only thing that I have to do is trust. Lord, I pray that each day I will lift my eyes to You and acknowledge Your sovreignty over my little life and give You praise for even caring! There are so many bigger and better things out there, and I sometimes wonder why You bother with me. But I know that all of this is for Your glory and praise alone and that You know what You are doing. Take my mind off my future and place my attention solely on the work of the cross. Be glorified in my last week at the daycare and allow me to be a shining example of what "the light of the world" should look like! IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU, JESUS!! God is soo good.... :)

Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to Your name be

the glory forever, because of Your love and faithfulness.

Psalm 115:1

Follow the Leader....

2006-07-26T19:21:00.000-07:00

For You are my Rock and my Fortress; and

for Your name's sake You lead me and guide me.

Psalm 31:3

So there is this absolutely cute, in a somewhat annoying kind of way, little boy at my work. At a mere 5-years-old, he is the youngest of the school-aged children. At the beginning of the summer, every time we asked the children to line up, he would ask, "Can I be the leader?" So, in order to never disappoint, we formed a line system and now the children always line up from shortest to tallest. Being the youngest, he is also the shortest, thus, ALWAYS the leader!

That said, this weekend I went home to the MOB and was able to go to Christ Fellowship Baptist, my home church. On Sunday, Dr. Lawson preached two AMAZING sermons about Christ's command "follow Me," from Mark 1:16-20. In this text, Jesus calls four of his disciples out of their fishing boats and promises to make them "fishers of men." He did the same for you and I when He called us out of darkness and into the Light. It was a call to leave behind everything that you know. You may not remember your exact call time and date, but if you claim to be a child of Christ, then you have been commanded to FOLLOW THE LEADER!

Send out Your light and Your truth; let them lead me;

let them bring me to Your holy hill and to Your dwelling!

Psalm 43:3

We are called to be fishers of men and if we aren't fishing, then we aren't following! And to not be doing either of those two things is sin. It is disobedience! When I think about my job description in terms of "fisher of men," I can't help but be amazed at the amount of responsibility that God has bestowed upon me. He wants me, SARAH A HEWES, of all people, to, not only be in His company, but help Him find others and lead them to His cross, thus equipping them to now fish for more men! I feel so unworthy as is it to claim the name of Christ, much less help bring others to His throne.

So let's recap. Children always want to be the leader, but when you are a child of the King, you don't have that option. By partaking in the free gift of grace, you give up your right to ever be the leader again and you agree to be lead in Spirit and in Truth! There will never be a line system with Jesus. He will always be in front and we will always be following in His footsteps. I pray that I will hasten to follow His lead daily. Whether He leads me to Auburn, New York, California, Asia, the farthest corner of the earth, etc. Lord order my steps and quicken my heart to cry out "Wherever You lead, Lord I will go!" Jesus, You are the Source of my life and my Leader, You are my Sheperd and my Provider. I praise You and thank You that You know all the plans that You have for me. God is so good......... :)

And He said to all, “If anyone would come after Me, let him
deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me.
Luke 9:23

ps....i would strongly suggest that you take some time to listen to those sermons. You can hear them online at http://cfbcmobile.org/site/cpage.asp?sec_id=377&cpage_id=421&secure=&dlyear=2006&dlcat=Mark

Once Upon a Year...

2006-07-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

Christmas 2004

One year ago today, I lost my hero! He fought the good fight and he, not only finished, but he won the race! For those of you that don't know, today is the one year anniversary of my stepfather's death and the last 12 months have been such a reminder of God's grace that helps us to get through. In Paul's letter to the Corinthian church, he writes,

"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power

is made perfect in weakness." Therefore

I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses,

so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

2 Corinthians 2:9

He has been sufficient to grow me in my weakness. I think that I have grown more in the past year than total in my four years as a believer. God really knows how to humble His people and make them cling to the cross of His Son. When Kelley died, I think I had fallen as far away from God as one could get, I had an "I don't care" attitude and in Kel's death, God made me realize that none of this life is about me! Hard lesson to learn? Of course!! I think about God's timing and I have to just glorify Him for knowing exactly what it would take for me to turn back and find my way back to His throne. The biggest lesson that I learned was figuring out how to be grateful for EACH and EVERY day! When Kel went to the hospital on July 4th, my selfish thoughts were "I'm over this" and little did I know that 15 days later we would be leaving the hospital without him. Yes, it has been a tough year and I miss the stink out of Kelley, but I wouldn't EVER want him to come back! I know that he is bowing at the foot of our Savior and lifting up sweet songs of worship each moment and that he will be there waiting for me one day. In all honesty, I am a bit jealous, but grateful all at the same time. I am so excited that he humbled himself before the mighty God about a year before he died. He was such an amazing example of a changed heart and he lived out his faith. He was a blessing to our family and he will ALWAYS be my hero! His spirit lives on in the midst of sadness and grief, and it is a spirit of a disciple who undoubtedly heard

"Well done, good and faithful servant. You have

been faithful over a little; I will set you over

much. Enter into the joy of your Master."
Matthew 25:23

Thank you God for teaching me lessons and growing me through the toughest hour of my life. Teach me to find my strength in You and to use this time of weakness to glorify You and You alone. You are the only one worthy of my praise and I pray that I will never neglect to lift my eyes to You in times of great need. What a friend I have in Jesus! God is soo good... :)

2006-07-17T19:26:00.000-07:00

Here are the rest.....